Feeling Ignored and Alone in My Relationship

You deserve more. You deserve better.

It doesn't replace the comfort I feel it doesn't fill the emptyness i feel its not the same its not laying my head on his chest when I'm tired and fighting sleep (when he knows I'm really tired and don't want to sleep he will push my head on to his chest and I'll be asleep in just a few mins he's done it many of times when he knew I needed sleep) its not the same as laying my head on his lap or even just his leg when I'm starting to feel that I need that comfort its not like I'm asking for much I'm asking for comfort, communication not just a look at my message and then ignore it like u had the time to look take a second to send me a little kissy face like u use to or even a small message going "hey I'm busy at this second I'll let u know when I'm done" its not like I'm going OK we have to have s*x right now I don't ask for that we use to do that every day a few times a day and then it went to a few times a week then a few times a month now to when ever he feels up to it

Even in my current relationship. I started to set my boundaries and I am keeping to them.

It's always okay to compromise but never compromise yourself in a relationship that is causing you pain. I lost myself a few times and the last 3 years I made sure that didn't happen again.

all I can really say is to be careful. I mean you can keep a friendship with him and the baby mother but I wouldn't keep your heart in the position to be torn.

So its like I knew what I was getting in to with him having kids I have 1 of my own so it was a thing we both understood I was around 2 of his kids for a little before their mom decided "oh u can't see them anymore" and after that I got to be around one of his other kids and her mom me and her became like best friends and his little girl (one of the ones I kinda question) adopted me as a mom and my son as her brother and her mom was fine with that we would go out and she would tell the little girl "look there's other mommy and big brother" then she was ripped away from us and now the 3 boys are bk from out of state with their mom the boys get along with my son but now I'm being pushed away because of her

Its like I knew what I was getting in to when we first started messing around he has 9 kids ( 3 girls and 6 boys he doesn't get to see 3 of them 2 of the girls and one of the boys) 2 of the kids he has I kinda question if they are really his becaz one the girl had someone else sign the birth certific and she doesnt really look to much like him and then this other one I haven't seen her and from what I was told at first the mom was saying she wasn't his Caz she was with someone else around the same time it was a one night stand for him we got in to a fight last year and he ran to an old friend and slept with her

( im sorry i go on and on and its pointless sometimes but it kinda helping a little bit to just let it all out i have no one to talk to ever) It just hurts so much I never ask much from him at all it's always let's just cuddle up and watch a movie or play a game together or lets go for a walk hell I have even called out of work on a sunday becaz I just wanted to just lay there with him and watch movies caz I was feeling a little blue there was nights to where I would get off after 10:30 at night and have to be snack at work at 6 in the morning and he would ask me to come over when I should of been going home and going to bed and I would jump right there. I have been there for him more then she has there was one night that I got off late and he was having a really bad night he got in to a fight with a friend and i was getting messages from him bout how he was feel and he decided to get drunk and go for a drive caz he wanted to kill himself I broke every law I could go get to him doing 100 in 35s, running red lights and everything to find him and after I found him and got him safe with me I stayed up all night to make sure he was ok even thought I had work the next day but here he tires to call her she couldn't be bothered its like yes they have kids together and a past together and we don't have any kids together (we almost did but I lost it he doesn't know anything bout that at all) and almost 2 years together I have been threw hell and back with him and I would do it all over the only time I have been feeling happy lately is when I'm around him. All she ever does is bitch at him before she came back to state she would call him and yell at him about stupid shit she uses him for his money (I understand if like the kids need something they have 3 together but she has a total of 4) she would call him and go "the kids want a toy I'm using your money for that" ( when here he would only have enough for gas for the days I can't take him to work or he can't get a ride) and she would do that for all 4 of the kids not just his he has to pay for her other child that's not his. Hell he got a 2nd job and I was so supportive of it Caz yes he needs to make money to pay his bill he works as much overtime as he can with his main job and yes it sucks caz on my days off it takes time away but I understand and I'm supportive of it but she told him that once she got here he had to stop taking overtime and be off of work the time he should be off (no later then 2pm) and she made him quiet the 2nd job and before she got here she was sending me long ass messages saying he didn't care bout the kids and all of that and I told her that he's working to be able to pay his bills and to be able to make sure the kids have what they need and she went off on me I just wanted to go look bitch u get money from him u have access to his card if he can't work u don't get shit

I'm sorry you're having to deal with that hun. I hope he gets his head out of his behind and give you what you're asking for of him WHICH IT IS NOT A LOT AND NOT TOO MUCH!!!!! You are more than enough and it is very bad that you have those thoughts but it's normal when we are depressed because we feel like we are doing so much wrong and that we're not enough and for men, who aren't inclined to that, we are too much for them. But you should never have to beg your lover for his affection. Especially if he depends on you as his girlfriend for a way to and from work and that's yalls time together that you depend on. In my opinion, since he's trying to be hurtful, you should give him the cold shoulder and focus on you for a few days. Be very short with him, and do not give him a ride. He obviously has other means of getting around. In those few days, if he doesn't make the effort to come to you, come see you come check on you, that means he's not meant for you. In my opinion he's only there because of the benefit of you. I've been handled that way and I've learned that choosing you over any relationship is key to being free and more independent and valued.