Gender and Healthcare: How Has Your Experience Been?

No bit once you have a condition that deals with the mind they sure do like to playmate you like you're stupid and ignorant. I get playmates all the time because my doctors don't understand adjustment disorder with anxiety. They don't ask me why I have that condition. Well I finally messed up the information in hopes they quit treating me like my IQ is 5

To me been a female affect everything

Being assigned female clealer directly impacted how much ive been taken seriously and diagnosed with things, I was told repeatedly my chronic pain was from having large breasts but 5 years post top surgery and its only gotten worse and we still dont know whats wrong with me. Also speaking of top surgery, due to being trans I wasn't given adequate care by an urgent care doctor for my top surgery and my right nipple has been irreparably damaged to the point that it just looks like a lower case 'e'

I've been treated like a liar or a drug seeker

I feel like no one never takes me seriously I feel like I'm kind of judged per se

Everytime I go to doctor they always bring up my weight because I’m a woman. I have lost over 250lbs and still get it ,it’s annoying

I think men are believed more readily by doctors

As a man people and Healthcare persons just want you to man up and always assume your lying or making it up or over exaggerating. I don't ask for help or what's wrong till I absolutely have to and then to get the man up speech they wonder why we don't open up

Yes yes yes

Dismissal of symptoms and pain and refusing to do more tests. I remember going in to get an IUD and I was told that before I show up, I need to take an ibuprofen. Worst pain of my life 😭 and I couldn't walk for two days afterwards. And the nurse complimented me saying how well I behaved because I didn't scream. She then went on to tell me that adult women who come in scream in pain. I had tears going down my face and she complimented me on not screaming. Don't ever tell me again it was just a pinch.

I went to the doctor once extremely sick. The only thing the doctor wanted to do at urgent care was a pregnancy test. After going to the emergency room, I found out I had two viruses at once that could've killed me. I even told them I'm a lesbian.

I was born male, but I'm not really fussed about how I'm perceived. My problem is that all of the symptoms I had for ASD and ADHD were stereotypically feminine traits, so they were ignored for years, as I didn't fit the stereotypical "loves trains and runs around" male traits of these conditions

(For reference, im trans ftm). One doctor refused to give me my anxiety meds bc "with everything going on with the... uhhh.. gender stuff, it's too complicated of a case for me. But it's a free country and all.."

Every time I say my stomach hurts I must be on my period or pregnant. Once I went back to the er several hours after they let me go because I was bleeding anally and the FEMALE doctor insisted on doing a rectal exam to confirm that's where the blood was coming from. I think I know the difference between actually bleeding and period blood, I'm 33. Also I have an IUD and don't have periods.

It's called gaslighting, I was fobbed off with saying I had fibromyalgia when I knew it was not just that, and trust me chronic pain patients are a majority of the time gaslit, we are seen as time wasters and drug seekers, anyway turns out I have an autoimmune disease which is life threatening, I'm not responding to any treatments they give me, then they said, if we had caught it sooner, that made me so mad

PED is not just caused by Chlamydia, it can be caused by any type of infection in that area, i got it from a laparoscopy, one of my fallopian tubes got infected from the procedure, causing it, so your Dr was wrong there, I've never had Chlamydia

Basically been raped by gynecologists. Didn't used to be able to get birth control pills without a vaginal exam. I have vaginismus. The muscles tighten and I can't control it. The doctors thought I was being difficult and would just shove their way in while I was in horrible pain. Once I nearly passed out.

I know this isn’t always the case, but all the males I know who also have EDS have all been diagnosed much, much, much sooner than I was even though my symptoms had been ongoing since childhood for myself and most of the guy’s symptoms only started fairly recently.

I was once told that only overweight, depressed, middle aged women could get fibromyalgia and that it was just a fob off illness to make them quiet, BY A MEDICAL PRACTITIONER. I am overweight, depressed, but not middle aged. So apparently I didn't fit the criteria! I fought it and got my diagnosis along with the hundred and one others. Don't let them break you into suffering in silence ❤️

Being medically gaslight, dismissed, told it’s not as bad as I claim (like I want to pay medical bills when I don’t have to, I can’t imagine someone doing that for fun and why would I come here unless I really have too?!) and or that nothing is wrong and it’s all in my head (which isn’t that a medical problem too?!) bc I’m female.

Since I was 13-15, I’ve been receiving trans healthcare through the trans clinic at my local Children’s hospital. But I’m 18 now, and since my primary care is through the children’s hospital, it’s becoming almost impossible to get any treatment for my ailments. The biggest hospital in the area is connected to a college, and I don’t attend that college nor do I have a pre-existing account there so they won’t see me. Other, independent doctors keep saying that I can’t use a children’s hospital referral to receive treatment through them. But I’m at children’s because the trans clinic gives me the hormones that I need, so it’s like I’m stuck in a loop. No one will answer me because my referral is from a children’s hospital, but I have to be seen at the Children’s hospital because they handle my gender care. Eugh.

A doctor once instead my acid reflux was because I was pregnant. I was 15 a virgin and had a negative pregnancy test at the hospital. It turned out I had oesophagitis.

Well being in the closet means I can't face any homophobia/transphobia. Still it stings to be called by my birth name and she/her pronouns.

I’m a nonbinary trans man on HRT. I have a heck of a time finding doctors who know how to treat me, because most have zero knowledge of how HRT or chest binding works. One panicked about my (safe) chest binder. Another had to Google answers in front of me about LGBT safer sex practices. I’ve been deadnamed and ma’amed left and right, despite having a tenor voice and a beard. I’m terrified how they would handle things if my life were on the line, and not just a routine check up.

Most male doctors prefer to speak with my husband over me.

i’m an indigenous (cisgender)woman, and there’s no denying that misogyny and racism is prevalent in the medical field. any time i bring up pain, it always gets shot down. it’s a huge stereotype that all natives are desperate drug addicts, looking for new narcotic prescriptions and medical professionals definitely take it as fact. i’ve been dealing with chronic pain that’s only been progressing, and i finally got a doctor to listen to me. she was another woman. if i am able to, i’m definitely going to be requesting bipoc women to be my pcp for the rest of my life.

😥 Negatively. I hate getting pap smears.

Being on testosterone caused vaginal atrophy and Ive had an awful experience with an ultrasound tech misgendering me and telling me that I shouldn't be in pain during an internal ultrasound... I was nearly crying in pain and having a PTSD flashback. At the same obgyn office the Dr who also treats my mom gave me a lecture about listening to my mom (who's transphobic) and misgendered me the entire appointment. I pass, and even the non passing trans ppl shouldn't be misgendered either, I haven't been misgendered other than by family in over a year, and I told her my pronouns and that I'm on T, so it's not like she was making an innocent mistake

i used to have a lot of anxiety about going to the doctor because i'm trans. especially when i was a teenager cause my transphobic parents chose my doctors. i'm a lot better about it now and don't delay seeking care anymore, but that's all due to me thankfully living in a relatively trans friendly city. getting trans healthcare is still a nightmare in most places

My gender hasn't really affected anything. I get treated with respect. And even though I'm having a baby right now my pronouns are respected as they/them and they call me by my different name and refrain from my birth one. I haven't been treated a bad different. When I was in the mental hospital they have me my own room because I identified differently. And they made sure I was comfortable and corrected others on my name too. I haven't really had a bad experience.

I always have to choose between healthcare providers that know about gender stuff and will use my pronouns correctly, and ones that can actually help me. Often I end up with neither, or both but they won't communicate with each other.

As a trans person, it's pretty much a nightmare. My pcp is amazing, totally cool and understanding, but trying to find a gyno that's comfortable with me or trying to get a therapist that doesnt try to connect my gid with everything is the worst. Gods forbid I have to find another pcp...

Fortunately for me, very little. However, I have been screened for ED’s basically every time I’ve been hospitalised because I am a female on the thinner side— I’ve never struggled with eating or weight or ED’s. I know that if I was a male with the same BMI, this would be overlooked. That said, it is worse for men that they somehow have to be “more unhealthy” for anyone to raise suspicions of an ED.

Yes! They refused a lifesaving surgery because they thought it was "gender affirming surgery" because it was a reconstructive bottom surgery. It wasn't to do with my gender at all but that's what they labeled it as and refused. Had to move to get care

Besides the confusion around pronouns, where each medical professional in a room might be referring to me by something different 😂... Many ER visits where treatment for a completely unrelated known condition was significantly delayed because they "have" to test for pregnancy "for all women" even though I'm not a woman, and had 0 chance of being pregnant. Wasting time to comment on the status of the reproductive system on scans when the diagnosis is entirely unrelated to it. It happens even now that I don't have those parts anymore. Though, since transitioning, I find I'm taken much more seriously presenting as a masculine human.

Yes, nobody ever believes me, it is exhausting trying to get diagnosed with anything as a woman. It happened to my mum too the doctor told her she was having panic attacks watched her have one in the room with him and then it turned out she was actually having hundreds of mini heart attacks for months and literally could’ve died like I left her while she was having one once because we got in a fight in town (she was abusive my whole life) she started having one and I couldn’t deal with it because she’s usually very manipulative so thought it was that and I genuinely left my mother in town while I walked home and she was a having a heart attack

Yes.

I went to the doctors to get my physical done about 2-3 months ago, that day I decided to wear some biker shorts and a tank top that was covered by a jacket. My mom decided that it was too inappropriate to go to the doctors like that and said "you will not go out with me like this" , so I decided I wasn't gonna go out , but she was nagging me about it for the next 30 minutes until she finally agreed. I feel very sexualized by someone I once trusted so much. I could go on with all the times she's hurt me.

I've had a gynecologist repeatedly misgender me, and my mom had called beforehand and told her that I'm not actually trans (my mom is transphobic) and so instead of listening to my concern she lectured me about listening to my family and respecting my mother. I'm 19, so there's no excuse for that conversation at all. And then at the same place the ultrasound tech was nasty and dismissive when I was nearly crying from pain during an internal ultrasound.

Not at all

Not at all. They don't ask, I don't share. My sex however means I get labelled hysterical though lol

I say, it’s time to get some new medical opinion.

In a few ways it's been good, because when I was hospitalised I was put on a mens ward which gave me a lot of euphoria and a lot of doctors treat me as a cis man, but soon after I came out and starting trying to get help for my chronic illnesses, my records were being changed and it caused a lot of confusion and stress when I was in hospital or having doctors appointments. Starting testosterone and having my GP prescribe it at first was a rough time, an Indian doctor said he "wasnt comfortable prescribing it" so I had to ask another doctor. He also would act like I was exaggerating mys symptoms and essentially would run me about over the littlest of things and would not take me seriously.

I once had a doctor tell me that having very irregular periods wouldn't affect me when I'm trying to get pregnant (before I was diagnosed with pcos) I literally had explain to him how periods and ovulation work

I've had doctors tell me that I'm not my preferred pronouns and then misdiagnosed my mental disorders due to it.

i haven't gotten the money to change my name legally so every time i hear The Dreaded G Word in a medical setting i understand but i still cringe super hard internally

I trans (ftm) and it’s always been an awkward subject with my doctors. They would always try to blame my issues on my period, and then never do anything about it except suggest birth control. I had a complete hysterectomy as well and I’m still getting asked about my period as if that’s the source of everything!!! It’s extremely frustrating and dysphoria inducing. It’s in my chart so you definitely don’t have to ask about it as if it’s still an ongoing problem. I’m down for talking about it with good reason, but there usually isn’t one with the providers I’ve seen. Definitely have had some good interactions with nurses though. If anyone wants to chat about anything gender or general lgbt+ related I’m definitely open for that though.

I was told as a teenager that “all girls feel that way, you’re just emotional” when I complained of dizziness and near syncopal episodes. IT WAS ACTUALLY A SERIOUS HEART RATE AND BLOOD PRESSURE DISORDER that is a chronic condition. But it took years for them to actually test me. Doctors dismiss women 9/10 times it feels like and thats one of the reasons women with chronic illness end up so traumatized and tired imo

In the beginning, my mental illness was always dismissed as hormones by my family and most adults (born female). And my mental health issues started at 8 years old but I only started to try to get help at around 11 (I had my period at 9 didn't get normal until 10). I frequently couldn't decide if I wanted to keep faking who I was or not and my family pushed this off as mood swings from my menstraul stuff. Basically I had way more years than I should have for my mental illness to get worse and worse.

I'm actually Apagender and so many people give me a weird look when I say that but it's a thing! When I tell people I don't have time to be caring about gender right now they're always like, oh so agender right? Heh, no. Two very different things. Agenders use It / It's , I use any pronouns. I've had so many people call me a man, so many people call me a woman, and others can't tell. So I gave up on gender.

Went to the mental hospital. Got misgendered and dead named a total of 24 times by one of the staff members. They had been briefed. It was on my chart. One lady even gave me a second wristband and wrote my preferred name on it for me to help me not be dysphoric. Then ONE staff member effectively increases my stay from 3 days to a week and a half stay at a place where 5 day stays are rare to never. 👍

Being a gay woman, I would say definitely. The amount of gaslighting and dismissal I’ve faced is absurd. Everything is written off as anxiety, or it’s ignored and goes uncharted in my medical files. The only diagnosis in my medical chart is anxiety and depression (which was diagnosed when I was 11) and I’ve developed 7 chronic illnesses since then that aren’t documented in my chart…

I almost died of sepsis because of medical neglect because I dress more gender fluid. So yes.

all my female therapists were awful, i recently got my first male therapist, and after all these years i feel like i finally have a real therapist. lol

I never knew they knew your sexual preference? I’m also bisexual but I never had to tell anyone my preference although I live in a small town. I did had some weird doctors tho

medical transphobia is super bad, and i’m frequently disregarded by medical professionals + i feel uncomfy seeking sexed treatment. also many of my conditions are under researched in AFABs and women or are under researched in general bc they’re more common in AFABs & women

I started hrt and anti depressants with in a month of each other. It's a weird experience because of the major hormone changes and cycles. Not a bad change just weird.

I’m nonbinary, AFAB, and I have endometriosis. Though a diagnosis by 19 and my first laparoscopy are 25 are far from the worst I’ve cases I’ve heard of, my pain was dismissed. The first treatment I got when the symptoms really started sinking their teeth into me- not birth control. Hydrocodone. For a 16 y/o. I don’t feel like that needs further explanation. I wasn’t diagnosed with ADHD until this year, at 29. The symptoms have been present since childhood, and a lot of my childhood trauma involves being abused for showing them. Same wrt being autistic- no doc diagnosis yet but literally every single “weird” thing is now explained. Even things I didn’t know were problems. I was also hospitalized for s/icidal ideation when I was 13- the treatment I got was inadequate and I didn’t have any therapy or even saw someone qualified to do pediatric psychiatry/psychology. 🙄 My lovely sperm donor later said my depression was “just hormones” and “just a phase,” despite his father and all four of his siblings having it. Admittedly a lot of stuff for me has to do with childhood abuse but NONE of the doctors involved in my treatment as a minor really gave a shit about me 😩 So so relieved to be in charge of my own care.

Dude doctors especially are just super dismissive and make me feel unsafe, but I am constantly terrified by the medical system and how disabled women are treated. It's even worse for other marginalized groups which is horrifying. I've been constantly told that my chronic illness is only related to anxiety, when there were things really wrong with me. Also, pain is seldom taken seriously enough, which I noticed at the gyno for sure. My nurse was amazing but nothing could have prepared me for how traumatic getting an IUD in is. It should fr be required to do local anesthesia, the pain is completely unbearable and I almost passed out and threw up😭it just feels like we're expected to endure so much pain and put up with so much shit in processes that should be safe and simple.

Anemic

When I was 13 years old I went on family vacation to an island where we went zip lining together. I came back from vacation and started having a ton of pain, blisters, and swelling on my hand. I went to the doctor and she misdiagnosed me with herpes, regardless of me informing her I wasn’t sexually active. This was really hurtful to me as I was so young and didn’t know much about std’s, but I just believed the doctor. My dad was enraged and took me to a different doctor and they informed me it was poison sumac and gave me a steroid shot. It was never an STD at all and it was really odd to me that a doctor would diagnose someone with herpes when they’re hand is swelling up. Ridiculous. Very damaging for a young girl.

I went to the er in December, ended up going back the same day. Cheif complaint was horrible stomach pains, like doubled over. They did a pregnancy test even though I have an IUD and when that was negative the doctor says "well maybe its just PMS". Ok I have PMDD so my cramps get bad, but I don't get periods because of the IUD and I know what menstrual cramps feel like. He called it gastritis and sent me on my way. When I came back about 7 hours later I was bleeding a ton, enough that the bleeding alone made me go back. The FEMALE doctor said maybe it was just my period. I'm like I know where the blood is coming from and thats not it. She insisted on doing a rectal exam to confirm that that was in fact the source of the blood 🙄. Of course, that triggered a lovely flashback because I have PTSD as a result of sexual assault when I was 16 so certain things trigger me. They finally did a colonoscopy the next morning and determined it was colitis. I literally had internal inflammation (which is apparently chronic) and they tried to brush it off as my period.

Not me but my husband. Idk how many times I've went with him and him explain what's wrong and a female doctor acts like just because he's a man, he doesn't understand medical terms, his body, etc. I've had to step in a time or 2 and remind them that he is perfectly capable of understanding everything.

That is absolutely ridiculous that you would have to contact the corporate office to have them change it from F to M. Next time ask them if you also need to contact them when you change your address or phone number becaue they make sure all that info is correct when checking in.....sounds like either the ones that check people in have a problem with that or the corporate office needs to update thier system so that kind of info can be corrected when necessary. They may want to throw in a little extra training while they are at it. So im curious did you actually contact the corporate office?? And did they fix that yet?? What some people deem is not important or "minut" can be very important to someone else. When and who im this world decided that it's ok to be rude to others.....unfortunately nowadays it run rampid. I'm dying to know If they fixed that!!

Currently, me being afab has lead to me being constantly disrespected as a man. Since I am 20 years old, no doctor thinks I can have the issues I have. The only reason why I have been able to get any care at all is because of the people in my life you stand up for me. Without them, I would probably be in an ER as a Jane Doe (Should be John, but you know how transphobic hospitals are.) On a ventilator. No ER doctors are able to help me and I am in constant pain. I'm told to excersize more and not be "so lazy", but that's practically impossible since working out (normal regime, not physical therapy) means my body breaks down more. I know *being* a man is supposedly going to give you more power, but it really doesn't when everyone around you sees your as a woman and then degrades you for speaking up for yourself because of wrongful assumptions and disrespect.

I had a dr during my SSI appeal hearing that was supposed to discuss my epilepsy, but all this douche bag would talk about was my weight (I'm 4'11" and 150lbs, which my PCP is fine with). It got to the point that the judge (bless that woman) cut him off and told that my weight is not what we're discussing. My brain is.

Not just doctors but I have such bad periods I cant work at my job sometimes from pain, the amount of blood, nausea, dizziness, period poops, over heating, etc etc. No one really believes me when I say the pain is so bad I'd rather have my uterus surgically removed with no anesthesia. I was just given basic birth control which admittedly has helped but I still feel like people think I'm exaggerating.

😥😥

I was by my pass doctor for years. When I would yell her how bad I hurt and the stiffness I could afford another doctor so I had to endure her incompetence. Now my ra has attacked my 🫁 and taken over 50% capacity, on home oxygen it socks. That these doctors don't listen, yes you went to.school and learned a lot but you still need to listen to the patient and add other specialist when a patient keep telling this same issue is bothering them. Our medicl world need to get better

Sorry you had to deal with such incompetence! So frustrating.

I can't count the amount of times I've been reading medical information and it's split into men and women. I'm a trans man and aside from the misgendering I'd get from being lumped in with the women category, I don't even really belong there. I have been on testosterone for 3 years now and I do not have the same biology as a cis woman and treating like I am just because of what the doctor said when I was born doesn't just make me feel bad it makes medical information very unhelpful. I have never seen an article break down where the difference in male vs female symptoms come from so I'm just left to guess at which ones I need to read because I have the hormones of a cis man and the anatomy of a cis woman

I had a rash on the back of leg that was spreading and painful so I went to a doctor. He said it was because I looked like sorority girl it must be an std cause I must be sexually promiscuous due to my looks. Wasn’t possible for it to be an std… Reported him never found out what happened I refused to go back there ever again. It wasn’t an std I was having an allergic reaction to pool chemicals where I was a lifeguard.

I have several stories but am already choked up reading all of yours. I guess I'm really not alone at all with this.

🤗

I had a make doctor rush me out without really even listening bc he took a personal phone call from his wife during my appointment and he apparently needed to not be Kate fir lunch. Absolutely unacceptable. I did complain but ended up finding a new doctor when I was told "oh wow, really? Everyone just LOVES him". Yeah, a little research and I realized the only patients who "loved him" were all men. I had shown up with my wife at the time. (I'm a lesbian) and he was visibly uncomfortable. Sad.

As a young female with a strong educational background in Biology, I have the privilege of being able to read a lot of the scientific literature about my condition, but I am always dismissed when I try to bring up things I have read about. I respect the opinion of the doctors first and foremost as they are the experts, but I hate being constantly treated as if I have nothing to contribute to the conversation regarding my health and treatment plan.

Kayleejade - i think you should've told HIM to leave, and send in a second opinion. 😤

A couple of Years ago I had a seizure at My boyfriends house I already knew I had a seizure disorder because I had been seeing a neurologist and he diagnosed me well i was there at his house and apparently I was having a pretty bad one so he called 911 and they took me to the hospital and everyone was so nice when I woke up until I spoke to the main doctor and he told me plain out that I wasn't having a seizure I was just crazy and I told him that I had seizures and I wasn't crazy and he said that's what crazy people say and told him I was leaving I wasn't going to be treated like that

😥😥omg these are horrible experiences and sadly Healthcare has become a $$ business now, there is almost none sympathy for the patient, no humanity.

Is it wrong to suggest that, perhaps, the issue is not as much "gender-biased" doctors as it is simply "doctors still to this day do not currently receive enough healthcare training and information regarding both atypical and female biology and functions to properly treat female patients, or patients with atypical presentations, with the proper level of scrutiny and skepticism as to run enough tangible tests to be as absolutely certain of the extant concern as contemporarily possible"?

I mean 🙄 that's not what I was getting at. Mistreatment of patients by doctors is a very large, widespread issue as evidenced by this public forum alone. My point was that structuring the question to focus on gender when nearly every reply is coming from an AFAB woman means this question could have been phrased "How has your healthcare experience been in relation to personal treatment by your doctor?" or "How does your doctor treat your self-reported symptoms?" and literally no part of any answer would have to change to still be a valid, sensical answer to the question as posed. “Perfection is Achieved Not When There Is Nothing More to Add, But When There Is Nothing Left to Take Away” —Antoine de Saint-Exupery This question as posed is far from perfect.

I definitely think being a young femme presenting person has made it so that my symptoms are often minimized and brushed aside as not being as serious as they truly are.

Yes! My dad and I were going through very similar pain and spine issues at the same time. The difference in care was insane, it took me over 6 months for a doctor to even offer me an MRI, and then it took months to get all the procedures and injections I needed. My dad had an MRI, a large array of pain medications, and procedure within a week.

😥 😥

Medical personnel on all levels whether doctor, nurse or any others are being trained to respect this now. So sorry for your bad experience. You may be able to file a law suit. I’d check with an attorney