Struggling with Anxiety and Depression

Wow this is so me! I had alot of health scares on top of the pandemic and 6 family members passing away last year. All I could think about was death and felt like I had no time and was dying as well. Which goes hand in hand with a panic disorder is impending sense of doom. It's a terrible way to live. The past 6 months have been much better. And let me say post pregnancy hormones can really mess you up. I am actively trying to save up enough money so I can go to therapy.

Starting therapy is a huge step as is taking stock of where you are at in your life and your physical and mental health. We develop coping mechanisms to survive that help us in the short term and hurt us in the long term. Part of the therapy process is undoing those toxic coping mechanisms and it takes some time to figure out what healthy coping mechanisms will work best for you. Facing our thoughts and life situations can make things get worse before it gets better. But the only way out is through. Lean on your therapist, your SO, this community and your friends. It sounds like you are determined to put in the work and start feeling better. Be patient with yourself and know it takes time but it does get easier.

Thank you for your response, it means a lot to me.💗 Now I'm crying because you are so right.😭 I am really trying, so very hard I feel like I'm fighting for my life almost. I need someone with me at all times almost, I hate being alone and tonight I will be, taking care of our 5 month old while my SO gets some rest. It is so incredibly difficult being alone with my thoughts. I feel like I am living my life as if I am actively dying as we speak and I know that's not the case at least I hope not.