I feel like I realise the reason that I'm fight for my mother's affection. I think I'm competing with my youngest sister for my mother's affection by being the perfect, responsible, listen to my mother's every word but I fail in all of these and my youngest sister always wins always right and I think that why my youngest sister doesn't like me at all. I self-pity myself, I'm such a hypocrite. I disgust myself and I will find a way to change this side of me, now that I know. I think these is why my youngest doesn't want to get close to me, doesn't like to interact with me, she most definitely want to take mom away from me. If she does, that will be the a most reasonable idea. I'm so distorting myself slowly, again I will try to change that side of mine but I don't know where to start.

Recurrent major depression disorder

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