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DragonLady47

481d

I don't know what category this should be under but I just wanted to know if anyone here has any advice on how to handle a narcissistic person I have been married for 29 years and I am getting sick and tired of dealing with his narcissistic ways it used to be not that bad but now I don't know how much more I can take. He had a stroke back in June but it is now December and he is able to work but he is not even trying to look for work he is expecting me and our 2 kids to do it all and let me tell you if it was not for are boys we would be homeless and/or without electricity and water and cable. The thing that is that my kids are getting tired of it and are thinking about leaving. Also everytime he didn't have a job which was a lot of we got evicted we would have to go live with his mother and I hated it not trying to be mean but both his parents passed away about 4 years ago so I know we don't have to go there. The problem is that he has never had to face the consequences of his own life when he did wrong. Instead of looking for a job he is on his phone taking calls from scammers because he thinks someone is going to give him something for nothing I really do love him but I don't know how much more I can handle of this and the worse thing is that he is trying to apply for Social Security not thinking about how it can affect mine. I don't know how he can call himself a man when he is doing nothing to help the situation. I need my Social Security for money to keep my insurance because all my specialist and extremely expensive and so is my medicine. I get SSDI for a mental health issue and now all of a sudden he is trying to do the same thing

Top reply
    • thunderstorm

      480d

      @DragonLady47 emotional abuse is violent infact it's probably worse than physical abuse since bruises cuts and broken bones can all heal within days or months however mental abuse takes yrs to heal if it ever does and more than not most people are never fully healed from mental illness and is one of the top reasons for suicide.

    • RPGgal

      480d

      Think of your mental health. I was with a narcissist for 8 years that was enough. The damage severely done. It's the hardest thing to do especially when it's all you know and that they've told you that you wouldn't cope without the etc. But you can do it.

    • Gwen71

      480d

      I sent you an text here Leese if you want to talk. I went through the same thing and I know how you feelšŸ¤—āœŒļø

    • Denotchka

      480d

      EPOā€™s excuse me.

    • Denotchka

      480d

      Call Social Security and see if heā€™s had any meetings scheduled. If not, pack your stuff and get out of there. If heā€™s violent, get an EPO, not a restraining order. Expoā€™s have more legal teeth. Iā€™m not sure about filing for divorce. Try to get marital counseling first. Divorce is a last resort unless heā€™s violent, in that case get out and yes divorce.

      • DragonLady47

        480d

        @Denotchka He is not violent just the emotional shit

        • thunderstorm

          480d

          @DragonLady47 emotional abuse is violent infact it's probably worse than physical abuse since bruises cuts and broken bones can all heal within days or months however mental abuse takes yrs to heal if it ever does and more than not most people are never fully healed from mental illness and is one of the top reasons for suicide.

    • Gwen71

      480d

      I just got out of a relationship with a narcissist boyfriend. I know it's very hard thing to go through, believe me, I know but if you want to talk, just give me an I.M. and I'll get back to you.šŸ¤—šŸ™

    • RenaissanceGirl

      481d

      Iā€™m so sorry for the strain youā€™re under. My ex and dad are both narcissists and itā€™s a hard personality to live with. I canā€™t speak to your situation, but their selfish behavior led to emotional abuse from both of them. I left my ex almost 13 years ago now. Removing my dadā€™s toxic presence has been slower. Narcissists can improve their behavior, but only if theyā€™re willing to acknowledge their issues and work the problems. Iā€™d guess the reason it got worse was his stroke. When they keep busy, itā€™s easy to let things slide, or they just donā€™t build up as fast. My dad retired and it was like everything was cranked to a 10 on the intensity scale. My ex was on disability and behaved a lot like youā€™re describing. I was selling my last DVD to buy formula for his son (previous relationship), while he spent obliviously happy hours on the PlayStation. I canā€™t tell you what your should or shouldnā€™t do, your situation is different than anyone elseā€™s. I know what helped me was finding support at my local Center for NonViolence, and starting with a counselor. You sound like things are becoming overwhelming, the best thing you can do is take care of you. Then work on deciding what you want to do about everything else. You can only control what you do, and more importantly, you canā€™t take care of anyone or anything else if you arenā€™t solid. Message me if you ever want to talk.

    • Scnagle84

      481d

      ā¤ļø

ā˜ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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