How Parents Can Mess You Up: A Millennial's Perspective

Omg yes lol. Both are addicts and I feel like I raised myself in a lot of ways unfortunately. Sorry you feel the same. Im trying to process and heal from childhood which started around your age.

I'm 25 and I feel your pain! I was raised by my grandma because my mom was a degenerate and my dad is the invisible man 😂 my grandma is a wonderful person but she was super religious when I was younger and it messed me up, among other things. Plus, she comes from a generation where mental health wasn't really talked about much, or where misconceptions were even worse than they can be now. She would just tell me to pray or read the bible. She's a lot less pushy these days and our relationship is pretty good. She still doesn't believe any diagnosis I get but hey, baby steps.

You are very wise. I probably need counseling to fully understand what happened to me. My Mother did not have me until she was 43. She was also sick all the time with heart problems. They were too old to raise another child. I was very lonely and stayed to myself. Later on in my life I realized I needed to hear the words I LOVE YOU! They meant well but I ended up feeling unloved and alone.

Amen on that. I fully understand where you are coming from. If you woukd like to share, I am here! 🙏💕😥

My parents neglected me so I guess so.

I’m also 25 and trying to heal from the damage from my family and struggling

Im 25 and I realized I had no value to my parents or my adopted parents. It's a hard pill to swallow but I'm healing every day.

30 and yes

28 and they’re still messing me up lol 😢 It’s confusing too because from what I understand, they had pretty decent parents. While I feel like now as an adult, I blame myself sometimes too for keeping the behaviors that I’ve grown to do. I’m trying to fix myself with years of therapy, but it’s hard to let go. Definitely anxiety, panic, paranoid, people pleaser, pushover, depression, non assertive, walking on eggshells, etc are still ruling my life for sure.

24 and for sure

This Be The Verse BY PHILIP LARKIN "They fuck you up, your mum and dad. They may not mean to, but they do. They fill you with the faults they had And add some extra, just for you. But they were fucked up in their turn By fools in old-style hats and coats, Who half the time were soppy-stern And half at one another’s throats. Man hands on misery to man. It deepens like a coastal shelf. Get out as early as you can, And don’t have any kids yourself."

oh absolutely. my parents sucked at being parents for their own reasons. my mom has come to terms with it, but my dad is still neck deep in denial. that's fine, he has his second chance wife and two kids. I think he knows how it'll go if I find out my baby siblings have the same dad I had. my relationship with my mom greatly improved after she acknowledged her shortcomings as a parent and I stopped thinking of her as my mother and started thinking of her as a roommate and friend instead. she was a terrible mother, but she's a good friend. I don't know if I'll ever have the same relationship with my dad, but I honestly don't care if I never hear from him again after his youngest child turns 18 lol

Mentally and physically messed up by my parents here. Parents divorced, mom decided to sabotage my health in ways to try and get my dad in trouble, and said I was lying about my symptoms and so I never got help for anything until recently (Im 24). Mentally, well. Yeah. PTSD came mostly from the parents

Me too! Therapy is helping but I can't help but wish my parents had done a few things differently.

31 here and yes definitely

I'm 24! And definitely feel that way