Struggling with My Emotions in a New Relationship

okay so hi, my name is bo. anyone who views this, please give me some advice. due to past relationships, ive been fucked over. im not the same kind of significant other that i was before. im not sweet or kind anymore, which really sucks. the last person i really talked talked too was this guy. lets just say he fucked me over and i ended up crying to his bestfriend about it. we became closer and he started to like me. i also started to like him back. then the feelings were on and off. and it wasnt just about my feelings for him, just any kind of feelings. i didnt know how i felt and etc. everytime we talk over text i dont really like him, but irl it’s different? hes the first boy whos treated me right but my feelings are so on and off. hes a super sweet boy and i just dont know if i can reciprocate those feelings. im super confused on what i want and how to get that. :(