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782d
So I don’t really know what to do. Lately I’ve been inwardly depressed. I walk around and talk to everyone and laugh and seem happy but my thoughts are intrusive and I feel like poop most of the time. Part of me feels I should go to a inpatient but I can’t. i filled my schedule so I would have no downtime to be sad. I also feel like if I went I’d let everyone down. Since I’m busy all or March and April I probably wouldn’t be able to go to the hospital till may. I’ve also thought about stopping taking my meds but I know my moods swing hardcore when I’m off them and I don’t want to let anyone down. Part of me wants to start self harming again but I’m going to Florida at the end of March and I can’t let people down. Everyone thinks I’m doing well. I mean I’m a A honor student and I’m in all these activities, shouldn’t I be happy? :(
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Bipolar Disorder
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778d
I know it sounds cliche, but there’s no such thing as a “scheduled” crisis. If you are in pain right now and are struggling w ideations of harming yourself, the right time to get help isn’t in May, but now! There are always going to be reasons not to get help.. trips, friends, a weekend event, school. Eventually you may get to a breaking point and it’s better to go before that happens. I know it’s hard but the first step (admitting you want help) is done.. the next step is getting help. I suggest talking to a professional about how you’ve been feeling and having them assess what treatment options may be right for you. Sending you love and care.
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totally feel you with the A honors thing. I'm so depressed and trying to come out of it but I pretend like everything is fine so i don't let anyone down. I have a full ride. it's not like I can just stop now. I have to keep going. it's like I'll die if I don't. which doesn't sound half bad. I totally understand you. I hope that you feel better
780d
I am so sorry to hear that you’re going through this. Your feelings are completely valid. I’ve also been there, and it’s a tough road to navigate. Finding coping mechanisms that work for you whether they be journaling or some other method is very important. You are always more than welcome to reach out to me. Sometimes it’s nice to know that there are people who are in similar situations.
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I'm sorry that you are going through this. Please do Not stop taking your meds until you talk to your doctor. I would suggest talking with your dr and let them know what's going on. Sometimes you just have to take care of you. If you feel that you need inpatient, then you probably do. They can't fire you for it and as far as letting people down, sometimes things are out of our control and you gotta do what you gotta do. I pray that you get better. Good luck.
☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision
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