SeerClub

20d

I’m really depressed and I don’t want to make my boyfriend have to deal with me all the time. He says he doesn’t mind but he’s dealing with a lot more than me… idk what to do.. I try to think positively that I show him enough love but idk… like for example I got him a great birthday present and I know he will love it but I’m worried that it’s not enough or maybe it’s not the right thing because I don’t know many facts about his interests so I had to trust reviews… I just wanna show I love him and listen to him… but I feel like I don’t show it enough or well enough and that he just deals with me cause he loves me.

Social Anxiety

Depression

Anxiety (Including GAD)

Child emotional/psychological abuse

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  • jipperoni

    20d

    You are not inadequate to show love because of mental illness. Don’t push those who love you away due to your own feelings of feeling like not enough for those around you. Even though you may not understand why someone loves you, they love you and you’ve said it multiple times in this post. You recognize they love you, so why do you not want them to?

    • SeerClub

      20d

      it’s not that I’m trying to push him away. It’s that I’m trying really hard with mental and physical health problems to show that I love him so much it hurts. It’s more that I’m struggling with the fact that I feel like I can’t match that I love him just as much as he loves me. so I want to not push things onto him especially since my problems are in the past and he’s currently facing things now. I want to stand by his side and I’m just struggling to do that because of the mental and physical health issues. I still tell him things I’m dealing with especially when they are currently happening or just happened. I’m just trying not to make his load heavier since he’s dealing with so much already. Plus he has a gift giving love language and I figured this out by the fact everytime I find a pretty rock I give it to him and he keeps every single one. So I’m hoping that this birthday gift is what he wants and shows that I listen and love him. I’m just worried it’s not what he wants and he’ll be disappointed… and it will say that I don’t love him.

      • jipperoni

        20d

        I can see you’re trying and you’re doing a great job! I’m not putting anything against you, but he is sticking with you because he loves you. Do not let your thoughts get you all mixed up on that fact. Regardless of what you do, he loves YOU. I don’t know much about your situation of course, but loving involves loving people for their flaws, through their ups and downs, etc. Everyone goes through things, and now is a hard time for you, and that’s okay. He has stuff going on too, and that’s also okay. A relationship is a thing where you help each other through those things, build each other from the ground up, and intertwine yourself with the other through those healing processes. My favorite gifts I’ve ever been given are the smallest, a Polaroid of my friend’s dogs, a little tiny toy dragon, a CD, a smile on a piece of paper. Of course, again, I don’t know your situation, but your gift should be well appreciated. You said it yourself, you want to show that you listen to him and love him, and your gift will do exactly that :)

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