bugger

199d

I lost my mom when I was 8 years old. After she died, I felt like I had no purpose in life. She was my everything and I miss her every day. But lately it's been getting hard for me to remember simple things about her. I'm so terrified that I will forget her.

Depression

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  • Ander

    199d

    I lost my mom when I was seven and I'm almost 30 now. I've had the same fear for a long time. I thought about her every single day until I noticed I was only doing it 6 days a week or 5. I felt horrible about it. Like I was betraying her by not keeping her alive in my own thoughts. If it helps at all, I got to a point where I realized that I was hurting myself in a way by punishing myself over it. And I know that even only having 7 years with her that she wouldn't want me to hurt like that. Instead I got more pictures of her to keep around and got a replacement for a toy she bought me the year she died. It helps for me to look at it and know what she did for me in such a short time. When you lose someone that important you're going to feel lost for a while. It's different amounts of time for different people and grieving is for a lifetime but it doesn't have to always hurt. I hope this gets better for you.

    • bugger

      199d

      I have pictures of her up in my room and I have letters in her hand writing, but nothing ever feels enough. For a while I just wanted to be with her but I recently accepted that everything happens for a reason. I think I will always feel broken from this, but I'm trying to work on surviving with the few memories I do have.

  • Siobhann

    198d

    Can you start a journal? Write down all of the small moments you loved about her, her favorite things, etc. Write in detail about the memories you have.

    • bugger

      198d

      I have tried making an album with stuff like that but it's been more difficult than I thought

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