Struggling with Addiction and Self-Acceptance

My moms an addict and I’m scared I’m becoming like her I’ve never tried anything but weed but when i get sad I just crave anything that’ll take it away and I’m self aware and Ik that means I should probably get help because that’s not a normal thought process but I’m tired of fighting my mental Illness i didnt do this to myself but its up to me to fix and ive just been in a mood of this is who i am take it or leave it no matter how much self improvement i do ill never be fixed ill never be normal and I just don’t wanna be me anymore.