AurorraBorrealis

94d

I’ve been “doing” complex ptsd for 10 years not knowing what was wrong with me. I’ve been misdiagnosed with everything under the sun, every medication I’ve ever been on has made me and my providers concerned about my safety because of how they made me feel, last year they had me on lithium for bipolar 🤣. So this year I get diagnosed, and it’s almost like now I know what it actually is it’s my brains permission to get worse. I’ve had flashbacks the entirety of the night for 2 weeks, maybe more who knows what day it is. I pull it together in the morning and get on with it because I don’t have anybody taking care of me I don’t have family, I have roommates that are incredibly unempathic and self centered. I’ve never been able to hold a job too long due to all my symptoms work has always been a huge trigger. I’ve had 75 cents for 2 months along with food stamps and have somehow remained positive, but I’m at my limit. I’ve done so much therapy, taken so many meds, somehow put myself through college, for this. It’s not fair and honestly I don’t know if I have it in me anymore. And I’m tired of crying to my support system for them to tell me sorry and then forget the minute it doesn’t affect them anymore.

Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)

Lithium

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