Struggling to Sleep After Leaving an Abusive Relationship

it's okay to still feel those emotions. i have BPD, so the attachment to people i really shouldn't be is strong- i've been through so many "heartbreaks", where when i come to a more sober mindset, i realize i was just assaulted and it's honestly a good thing i managed to get out. i wish i could give you some magic words to make the feelings go away. but it's the same with breaking your ankle; no matter how much you know about breaking ankles, you still have to feel the pain to heal. you have all of these thoughts running through your head, so you're going to feel it. let yourself feel it. and next time you feel like you might be getting in a similar situation, remember how you feel now. this is an experience you sadly won't forget, but it'll shape you and you'll learn from it. as for the right now, i just had a similar conversation with my partner last night. when you feel thoughts ruminating, distract yourself; you might even distract yourself from the feeling too. what's comforting to you? do you like nostalgic games or cartoons? do you have a pet you can love on/ lay on/ talk to? i used to talk to my mice before i had a therapist, and stupidly it.... really really helped lol. if you're comfortable getting out of the house, maybe a walk? i pace around my room when i can't get outside. music is very comforting (if you're a weed person, smoke + music sesh + walk to get out my energy + sleep = a night where my mind is a little kinder to me). you did the right thing. i'm sorry it hurts. i don't know you personally, but i don't think ANYONE deserves to be in a position like that; you have bigger and better things and people out there for you. you are someone worth healthy love, and a lot of it! if you ever need to message, i'm here! i'm sorry if my long ramble was too much, i've gone through this so many times that i wish i had a way to help people better. i (platonically ;D) love you, and i hope life brings you all the love and comfort you need right now!