Orangemarigold

148d

Screamed and cried along to a song on my way home thinking about how being schizoaffective (bipolar) had already affected my life and the ways it will likely continue to get worse. I’m glad to have a supportive partner but I also worry that once he realizes what my future may be like that he won’t want to be a part of that. I would understand but it would be devastating to me as I’ve never felt as close to anyone else as I do with him.

Bipolar Disorder

Schizophrenia

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  • Derrick707

    148d

    I have schizoaffective bipolar type as well. I understand that feeling of doubt that it will ever get better. And I'd imagine it's pretty hard to have those fears of him being fed up. I've had similar fears with my family members.

  • Jonpup

    148d

    I have the same exact thing and I feel the same way for the longest time. And quite frankly, i had to make the hard realization that if he were to leave for whatever reason, I have to keep going. I can’t let one person drag me down as I have in the past. It’s a terrible realization, but it’s what kept me going for 26 messed up years

    • Orangemarigold

      148d

      @derrick707 the thing is he’s not the first one if he leaves bc of that. I feel like most of my old friend group is tired of me

      • Derrick707

        148d

        do you feel like you don't connect the same with them anymore? Them leaving is not your fault, although if you feel like it's your fault I totally understand and relate with that

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