My SH (self-harm) history is very rocky, I can go long periods of time without sh and not even think about it and then suddenly want to do it for seemingly no reason. Kinda just to do it at that point. (idk different problem for later) What I want to focus on is that I haven't sh since around the beginning of the summer, little bit before that even, maybe a month or more. But I feel no accomplishment. I just don't feel proud or like acknowledging that I'm doing a good job. Maybe because whenever I have sh nobody notices. Not even after they have completely healed. No one acknowledges it whether I'm doing bad or good so what's the point in rewarding myself. I could go on but I just don't have the words right now.
During my recovery i would go months and even a year without sh and i would hate myself. I just dont know other then that your not alone for the longest tike no one knew i did it til i told them. It took them up to 3 years before some of my friends found out.
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