Feeling hopeless and defeated

Personally, it depends on what your environment is like and how you grew up and surround yourself with- it really is. I don't know what you are going through but there's always a solution without meds, therapy, etc. Because almost always it's because there is a bigger reason why you feel the way you do. And for the medications and etc literally showing you it's not working is proof there is a grander solution out there other than what you are told is "supposed" to help. If anything- it could be numbing your true feelings from needing to be felt and released.

Have you considered mushrooms or cannabis? There are a lot of studies on the effects of both of them in treating depression and other disorders. They completely rewire the way the brain functions. I'm personally thinking of using them for my PTSD and psychosis. I think that's what you might have meant, but just in case I thought it would be good to mention.

I know how you feel, you may feel like straight shit. And you probably heard this before but, we need you here, yourself needs you here. You wouldn't be here if you didn't have a purpose. It doesn't matter how old or young you are, the world has something very special ahead of you, you just need to plant the right seed at the right time and place. We're here for you...

Lithium was the only med that helped me with the suicidal ideations. Someone I know said that the only thing that helped her was ECT. Please keep fighting! I hope things get better for you. Don't give up.

I don't know if this is down your ally, but there is electrotherapy/ECT for depression. From what I know some people say it's effective for major depression. However, I don't have any personal experience with it, so I don't know if it would be a good fit. I hope you find an option that works for you!