MrPicklez

135d

being a SAHM with schizophrenia is hard enough without having any real support system.
I just started sobbing because my son can eat a banana without any help (I know that's stupid, okay? I know.)
so I went to wake my fiance because I couldn't stop sobbing. He just seemed annoyed. I explained it to him but he was just like "are you fucking kidding me?"
He keeps SAYING I can come to him with my problems but when I try he just pushes everything I say to the side and starts talking about what he's doing. I can't vent to him, I can't talk to him. it's to a point that just looking at him makes me sad.
he BARELY involved in anything. I have to tell him to do things and if he actually gets around to doing it he half asses it.
maybe I'm being dramatic but I've been doing everything, cooking, cleaning, raising our son, being emotional support, being the punching bag. I thought he loved me? my knowledge of love is "doing what you can when you can and supporting the person no matter what.(unless abuse is involved)"
I don't even WANT to talk to him but I have no one else because he kept getting jealous about my friends so I stopped talking to everyone. I moved to the middle of bum fuck Egypt so we could have a new start and he doesn't seem to care. I don't know what the fuck to do!
I've tried caring, not caring, caring a lot, not caring at all. literally nothing I've ever done has been good enough for him.
What's even the point?
I don't think I want anymore kids.. at least not with him. he's making me so much worse and he's suppose to be my safe space.

Schizophrenia

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  • laceyandme

    135d

    Can you try family counseling. To get your emotions out in the open. Im also schizophrenic so i can relate to that

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