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Struggling with Memories of Abusive Ex-Husband

Karrieanne73

437d

So I have been away from my ex narcissistic abusive husband for 4 1/2 years now. I’ve been going through therapy to try to heal from all that he has done to me … and there’s a lot. I suffer from ptsd. Anyways yesterday not even remembering, I was going through my Facebook memories and right there it was our anniversary. I’ve been deleting any memory I find that has to do with him… but this one popped up and it just brought back soo many memories and not the good kind.. I was jittery all day and just wanted to cry… after all this time he can still control me and he’s not even here… then today, because I’m applying for long term care , the poor lady was asking about if I ever owned property and I had to go through that bad story and she asked about my divorce and if I had my divorce papers and I said yes they were hidden away but I could dig them out.. but I started bawling on this poor woman… I don’t really know what I need from this except maybe just to vent 🤷🏻‍♀️. Maybe from some people who will listen and understand. Thank you .

5

7

7

Depression

Anxiety (Including GAD)

Complex post traumatic stress disorder

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Top reply
    • nsiberian

      437d

      I went through this as well, but I was never married.. I have a child with him though, it can take years to heal from all the abuse, I wish you the best, know you deserve better in the future. But yes seeing that post was a trigger for you. I know how strong those feelings can feel. But you are out of the relationship, you are safe and you are on your healing journey, everyone's is different.

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    • Evaleastaristev

      436d

      Go to the settings for memories and tell it to hide all that include that name. I've had to do the same for similar reasons. You can also block dates, like your wedding day, and it'll stop showing you them. I'm sorry this happened, but I'm so happy that you got free.

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    • cat69

      436d

      Im a a survivor from a sociopathic/ narcidtic marriage with covert narcissist, and marriage to a overt narcissist. There is a meet up group for it too... Reach out if you want..im studying to be a domestic violence coynselir so am pretty informed on the healing path

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    • Ed80

      437d

      It’s totally okay to not be okay and to vent. My son, who is 8, told me that his mom is seeing someone recently and I fell apart. And then I fell apart crying nonstop to a friend. It’s okay to do that but not to dwell in it or it will eat you up I’ve learned. That’s why this community is here. Feel free to chat me if you ever need someone to talk to. I know what this feeling is like all too well.

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    • nsiberian

      437d

      I went through this as well, but I was never married.. I have a child with him though, it can take years to heal from all the abuse, I wish you the best, know you deserve better in the future. But yes seeing that post was a trigger for you. I know how strong those feelings can feel. But you are out of the relationship, you are safe and you are on your healing journey, everyone's is different.

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      Reply
      • Karrieanne73

        437d

        @nsiberian ❤️ thank you yes I hate finding triggering things . And something’s I feel guilty because I don’t want my boyfriend to think it’s because I have feelings for him . I talked to him about that last night and he told me he knows I don’t and that I was fine. That he was there with me when I went and got my belongings and I had to go knock on his door to tell him the haul truck had got stuck that we would have it towed out the next day and he saw how reluctant and scared I was to talk to him

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    • BraeburnGirl

      437d

      It’s totally okay to fall apart and cry like that sometimes. It will happen. You went through a very traumatic experience and reminders of it can make you just as upset as actually being in the experience itself. Give yourself a hug (no, really, try it, it helps!) and let yourself be sad/mad/upset, whatever you need. Sometimes that’s what we need to do and it’s totally fine.

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      • Karrieanne73

        437d

        @BraeburnGirl ❤️thank you so much . I don’t get to talk to my therapist until next week and I guess I just needed someone to tell me it was okay

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        Reply

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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