Dealing with Overwhelming Rants in a Friendship

@hurricane I am autistic and my friend thinks they might. So it sorta feels like difficult to communicate sometimes. And I do get the road block thing. And from what I can understood you def made sense.

@hurricane same here!! It’s like my eyes just can’t keep focus with the huge block and then I get so freaking overwhelmed and then I don’t talk to ppl lol

My adhd wont allow me to read the huge block of text i just sent so sorry if it makes 0 sense

Idk if your friend does or doesnt have autism but i do know that since i dont, i take extra care to be direct as possible when interacing with indivituals with autism (i work in a group home and a few of them are on the spectrum) This isnt very difficult tho tbh, its just verbalizing direct statements rather than social cues, because I know they wont understand me. You dont speak to a spanish speaker in english do you? In my personal opinion it can't place the entirety of the blame on you either, because you cant help it if you dont catch the social cues. I agree with the other commenters, setting up boundaries is important. But also, telling this person that especially when you feel passionate about something, their social cues arent going to be read. Its like if i was talking to a person who was hard of hearing and chose not to speak louder anyway, any possible anger from me at said situation wouldnt be justified.

i think, if it's possible, u should try to ask it to be more direct with u. would u like it to ask before it rants to u? whether u do or not, maybe setting that boundary would help with ur friendship

@moontosaturn I try to remember to do but it's hard because they don't ask either. And if I don't ask I apologize.

@trail_happy I think I ask? I haven't actually ranted in a while but at the same time I might? Because some things I randomly talk about might be considered rants because its tmi and stuff but idk. I can try to start doing that though.

do u ask the other people if they're okay with u ranting before u do so? if not, i think that would definitely help a lot. also, i personally don't think it's ur responsibility to pick up on social cues. if somebody has a problem with something u do, they should directly say it. otherwise, it isn't ur responsibility until they actually make it clear that there's a problem

Coming here to talk about it is a start :)

I’m sorry you’re going through this. Sounds like you and your friend need to enforce boundaries in a way you both will understand without being hurt. Maybe just asking if it is comfortable listening to a rant before starting.. I know that’s hard to do, but journaling or ranting online will help.