Insomnia, Dissociation, and Trauma: Help Needed

I have insomnia and I'm on meds. but this first full all nighter in over year. dad dropped v his ice cream. I froze. Idk why. no abused. they just toxic. dad yell. me go to room. I take a bath. don't feel right. dissociation is heavy for first time in year. take boiling shower. more than usual, back hurt and skin red red but not hurt as much as should. am shaking and can't ground. I also sorta crying. never want to leave tub. remember trauma ish, as in agnolage. cf eel weird. help. can't ground. exhausted. no sleep yet. only two more hours till sleep time. feel broke.