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tw: venting/talk of sh i do not see a therapist, i havent talked to anyone about this but i am fairly certain that my gf is my fp. i am trying my hardest not to be toxic or push my issues onto them because they dont deserve that, but they have this group of online friends that theyre very close with. they spend more time with them and while i always miss them i never feel like they miss me. i go into these episodes where i sh and contemplate breaking up because if i push them away first i wont be as hurt. i feel so unloved? whenever i bring it up they shower me with some comforting words but it doesnt really help, whenever theyre upset i give gifts and “feel good bags” with nice notes but ive never recieved that kind of care, only words. i cant tell if its just my mind being weird or if i actually feel unloved. i feel overly jealous and psycho, i dont really know what to do at this point. any advice?
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Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)
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having someone (especially someone who you’re in a romantic relationship with) be your fp is something very difficult, and i sympathize with you heavily. my advice is to be as honest as possible with them- preferably at a time when you’re feeling more stable, so you can have an honest, thoughtful, coherent conversation with. them. these feelings are hard enough to deal with on your own, and letting them fester and take over can be harmful for you and your relationship as a whole. i promise you, sharing your feelings (especially disordered ones that you cannot help) isn’t toxic. aside from being honest, maybe come up with ways you can reassure yourself when you see her spending more time with other people- i really like to read over old texts from my s/o, or watch a video or play games. i’m sorry if this is super incoherent or not helpful but you’re not alone and the way you feel because of your disorder is not your fault and will never be. i hope you have a great rest of the day 💕
☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision
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