Honestly, you shouldn't have to "deal with" the ablism. The things she says aren't something you should put up with. Being disabled isn't anything to be embarrassed about. I struggle a lot with using mobility aids and how people will see me, but you shouldn't. Call her out and if she doesn't listen, then I'd say that's her loss yk?

remind yourself that they're dumb and don't know anything, that every type of person exists and there will be people who do not care that you're visibly disabled and will still hang out with you

I have had to make it about educating my family members who don't get it so that it hurts less

My parents are weird about my platform crutches and calling me disabled and stuff. I’m sorry you’re dealing with this too!

i feel you. i mentioned to my mom that i was thinking about buying a walking stick, and without hesitation she said "don't buy one, you don't need it". she's also outright told me that i'm not disabled. meanwhile, we live three hours apart and see each other once every couple months, so how would she know, right? she and my dad just cannot accept the fact that i'm ill and disabled, because in their ableist mindset they think that means i've given up or that i'm undeserving of love and support. ableism from family is so tough.

I have used “The Spoon Theory” method to explain my pain levels as well as my fibro levels. It has helped others understand if the choose to listen. If you don’t know what The Spoon Theory is. Google it.