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Mr._Dank

487d

A week ago I was diagnosed with gonorrhea… I’ve only had sex with two people this year. And both too close together to really know. One person, I had sex with three weeks before the symptoms started, second, was the day before the symptoms started. They both get tested and both come back negative.. I feel like one person is lying to me. What would you do in this situation?

Top reply
    • RTJS

      482d

      @Mr._Dank Ok, given what you've said now, I'd say someone's lying to you or they had false results.

    • Sydie_Bear

      487d

      It is actually illegal in most places to knowingly, or recklessly transmit an STD. Lying about your status is considered reckless and knowingly usually! Honestly for the safety of everyone else involved, I’d make it clear to both parties that it’s not exactly a great idea to lie about their status if they’re lying. It’s okay to not be comfortable, there’s even services that can anonymously tell people you select that you may have given them an std and they should get tested. Shitty situation all around I’m sorry you’re dealing with that!

    • RTJS

      487d

      False negatives can occur sometimes, especially if they only caught it recently. If you think this is the case, ask them to get re-tested. There is also a possibility that you had it already, lying dormant (or appearing as minor symptoms that are similar to other illness). There is a slim chance you've had it from infancy or that you caught it from a different sexual partner before either of these two.

      • Mr._Dank

        487d

        @RTJS Infancy? Well damn haha. I’ve had sex before these people, yes. But I test regularly. This is my first incident. And these are the only two people of this year.

        • RTJS

          482d

          @Mr._Dank Ok, given what you've said now, I'd say someone's lying to you or they had false results.

    • Hollybelle

      487d

      I would write it off and just not sleep with either of them again. Stock up on condoms. They could also have false negatives. Or be embarrassed about it.

      • Mr._Dank

        487d

        @Hollybelle I used condoms with both of them. I was cutting one person off due to him becoming creepy, but had to reach out because of this. And other guy, I’m planning on not seeing anymore, even as friends. I understand why they’d be embarrassed but lying is worse than the embarrassment.

    • WhiteFlamingo

      487d

      One person is definitely lying to you. Since they were so close together, it's difficult to say which one. Gonorrhea can start showing symptoms within around two weeks, which means it could be either. What to do depends on your intentions. Do you simply want to know who it was for peace of mind, or do you intend to file a lawsuit? Some states in the U.S. allow civil lawsuits for failure to disclose having an STD when that status is known, but not all. I wouldn't know how to go about filling a lawsuit, but I do know that you should have copies of your discussions with these people in order to prove they lied about it. Personally, I would do that if I was able. If it's just for peace of mind, I recommend flat out asking for proof of results. That is really the only way to know for sure. They should have some sort of lab record to show, whether it's a piece of paper or a digital entry in a patient portal. Don't let them give you crap like, "Oh I don't have my results. I went to a walk-in clinic. They didn't give me a paper. Yada yada." Doctors have records of all lab results, and if by some chance they seriously don't have a patient portal or paper or anything, they can request a copy from the doctor. It sounds bad to demand proof, but the fact is that you could have only gotten it from them and both said they tested negative. The only other possibility is that you unknowingly came into contact with infected fluids elsewhere, which is much less likely. Either way, the second person should be tested again if they had only been tested before you were together. You should seek medical treatment, too. In fact, I think the most important parts of this are getting treated, being transparent with your partners, and not having sex with anyone while you can still infect them. You need to sell treatment before retribution, even if you do intend to file a lawsuit.

      • Mr._Dank

        487d

        @WhiteFlamingo thank you for your comment. It’s really for peace of mind for me. I’ve gotten both of their documents but some people and one person who is a lawyer brought up how it could’ve been altered with to make it look like they are negative right now. And I’ve already looked up to see how else you can get it and it’s only from intercourse so I know someone is lying. :/ I won’t file anything cause I think it’s a waste since I’m being treated and my symptoms are gone now. I just don’t like being betrayed like this..

    • Tweak_king

      487d

      If u feel like they lying keep digging it may be recent it may have been dormant… idkw2ty sorry someone is a lying douchebag…

      • Mr._Dank

        487d

        @Tweak_king Eh, I think someone’s lying cause they don’t want me to tell people. I’m used to being lied to, but this is a weird level of lying. Like why tf?

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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