Struggling with Depression and Relationships

I have been here a bit but have been so busy in life that it became a little stressful I wasn't able to express myself in a post of how I've been feeling but here I am and ready. I've been dealing with tons of health issues over the years and depression has been a major factor since. I went on meds believing something was only wrong with me until I found medication didn't take away my problems. I have been off of meds for sometime now but I feel I am going back into the dark part of my life again. I let everything bother me and it upsets me whether it be sad, mad, or angry. I'm not sure if it is me or the ones around me to be honest. I feel like I can't even get someone to love me look at me or be appreciative of me or the things I feel I do right. How do I just over look everything and enjoy life? I want sex but I don't want sex, I want to be touched but not touched, I want to go out and explore but I can't. I mean does anyone else ever feel that way? I love my man, I love my kids (especially my babies) and everyone. I want my man to love me, hold me, touch me, kiss me, something but I feel he doesn't want to or can't and at the same time I say I want that but I get so mad and frustrated when he does or he doesn't ugh. Does anyone else have this problem???