Feeling Overloaded and Taken for Granted in My Long Distance Relationship

Not too much to ask at all! In fact, I think more of us need to learn how to advocate for our needs—love languages included. What I see when I read your post is that you have a best friend who feels like that the right way to show care is by “fixing” things or trying to problem solve. When, in reality, what you’re asking for is to feel seen and validated. I think this is something your friend needs to know if you plan on keeping a close relationship. We all have different ways we need to be communicated with and feeling seen and valued is one of the most fundamental needs a person can have. In my own personal experience, I know just how low you can feel when life (primarily your relational life) makes you feel like you’re completely invisible. For me at least it was gutting and I’d never want anyone to feel the same. While long distance isn’t something that can be easily fixed overnight, maybe there are ways you can get creative? Even from a distance, you still need to feel like your cup is being filled. How are you doing on your other love languages? Are there little things your partner could do to make you feel more seen or validated? Or, alternatively, could planning for when you get to be together again bring enough anticipation to feel comforted in knowing you have a plan for your love language needs being met in the near future? I know there’s probably not a perfect solution, but I figured I’d ask as some food for thought.

Absolutely not too much to ask. Many of my past relationships have been long distance. I am very similar to you and your love languages. It’s hard but it can work if both parties are committed. But on the other hand, it sounds like your friend is concerned about your overall happiness. Most people don’t care to give you feedback or advice unless they feel comfortable to do so. Just food for thought 🙏🙏🙏

First thought I have, when reading, is that you need a new best friend, or at least another best friend. You need people that can uplift you, in your inner circle. I also have a similar love language to you: touch. I don't have anyone to provide that to me, right now. But what helped me, is when I had friends, that liked to hug people often. But my other love langauge: is words of affirmation/words of encouragement, and a special someone doesn't provide that one for me. My dad encourages me and that helps me feel better. You need someone like what my dad is for me, someone that's a friend, that hugs you, and cuddles you, someone who provides you, your love language, that's not your special someone.