Feeling Left Out in a Group of Friends

I was friends with this group of guys before I started dating one em, important to the story.. kinda. Anywho, let's call him J. I'm now dating J. H is one of the ones I'm closer with. It's a group of dudes. So J, H and I are in a group call via Playstation- a party. J and H have trauma, I don't know much about H's trauma but yeah. They'll talk about how they can relate because their lives were bad.. meanwhile I'm sitting here not being included despite the fact my life was just as bad if not worse. J knows 50% of my trauma and.. that's a LOT as is. When they don't include me in these topics it makes me feel as though my trauma is being belittled and not acknowledged at all. I don't know what to do. I was raised, technically trained would be the proper word, to not speak up for myself. Plus, I don't know if this is the correct time to do so.. so uh What do I do?