Struggling with Insomnia and Negative Thoughts

I was having bad insomnia for about a week and listening to a lot of Riz Ahmed rapping. This kind of came to me while I was struggling to go to work. It's probably not good but wanted to share in a safe place. I like the cold because my brain is always too hot. Going and going with thoughts. I can't handle all that comes through. It can be positive like Riz Ahmed thanks for giving me this as an outlet or negative with I really don't want to live. I'm stuck, broken but no one sees the marathons going Inside my head it's NYC on marathon day but my body could use that energy to do anything but searching for the will to live would be a really nice place.