So having a tough time right now. I told my best friend that I’ve been in love with her for ten years. She said I had a tendency to put her on a pedestal and that made her uncomfortable and no romantic relationship between us would be healthy. I was completely blindsided by this. While I did not expect her to reciprocate and was kind of confessing as a way to get over her, I didn’t know our relationship was a strain for her.
Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)
I can understand because I have put special people on pedestals too. We see as "that's how we want to be treated". However, if that person hurts or rejects us, we go the opposite direction; we hate them, we get very upset, or whatever. At least your friend was aware about you and knows you well enough to tell you the truth.
I tend to put others on pedestals as well. I've also been told absolutely no two a relationship and it crushed me for someone I had put on a pedestal. One of the things idi now is try to being people to a realistic level and remember their flaws. I think a lot of it also stems from my poor self esteem.
The favorite person category some of us put people in. Or just the over admiration can be a lot of pressure.
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