YaKnowTryingMyBest

179d

I’d give anything not to feel and think this way anymore. I’m so tired. Most of my life has been sadness and feeling empty and it doesn’t change no matter how much I try. Therapy, meds, hospitalization, nothing makes it any easier. I don’t have many friends, I’m either indifferent or irritated by my family most of the time, I don’t have money to change my situation. I’m trapped until I get the strength to end my life. Dying scares me, but living the rest of my life like this is a hell I will not put up with.

Chronic Irritability and Anger

Depression

Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)

Suicidal ideation

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  • deaddreams

    179d

    My life to has been full of mostly sadness anything I try to do to make the pain go away or at least hurt less only makes it hurt worse I drink and I drink and I smoke and I smoke but nothing helps its all a never ending cycle I am in hell I am trapped within My own mind there is no god even death cant realise Me from this pain My life is not my own I am just some sick fucks puppet for them to use for there own enjoyment only to be tossed away when I am no longer of use to them I give I cant take it any longer

  • Kelly1234567

    179d

    https://youtu.be/X0p6zlaGY8Y this guy helped me feel better when the pain was the worst. He was very suicidal for a long time and dedicates his life to this subject. His experience and feelings are relatable. Love you, stranger.

    • deaddreams

      179d

      I will give it a try thank you stranger

  • deaddreams

    179d

    Thank you for trying but the video attached to the link didnt make me feel better I dont think I will ever feel better

    • Kelly1234567

      179d

      you will feel better. Do these two things right now: 1. Take a walk around your neighborhood. 2. Eat something healthy. Then message me again and tell me if you notice any mood difference.

      • deaddreams

        179d

        it did make me a little more calm but I dont really feel better

  • deaddreams

    179d

    Yes I do have my dog right now I am still living with my mother my mother says I look like My drunk abusive dead dad so I cant live here anymore when I turn 18 when november 15th comes I cant live here anymore and she is going to try to keep My dog

    • Kelly1234567

      179d

      is your mom stable/ able to be reasoned with?

  • deaddreams

    179d

    No she isnt ether one I am gonna have to break in the house one day when there not home so I can get my dog back

    • Kelly1234567

      179d

      yes you have time to figure something out. Know why that’s kind of good, though? That means you’re in a toxic setting, which.. hear me out.. means you’ll likely start feeling a lot better once you move out. My mental state improved a ton when I left home.

      • deaddreams

        179d

        I know I will feel a lit better when I move out it just hurts

  • autonomous123

    179d

    Ive also lived in mental agony my whole adult life I have brain damage and find little joy In things. However what helps is taking simple things that you can change. Wear socks you like draw or sing or whatever it is that you like the little things that bring no conflict are where I find peace. There's no one answer but you do know I hope you find that peace and just know you are never alone. We all feel alone but we're here in our thoughts together. You're a unique human that has a special purpose here and I love you because you deserve that🤗

    • deaddreams

      179d

      your kind words are very thoughtful and caring thank you

  • autonomous123

    179d

    Always genuine, somebody has to be

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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