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Solarwolf

605d

I had a flashback tonight and I'm trying not to have a panic attack. my kid has a cut on his finger (a paper cut or maybe a cardboard cut) & me & his other dad were trying to get him to accept a bandaid for it (don't want it to get infected). he fought us a bit by hiding his finger & twisting every which way to avoid us & I grabbed his hand & suddenly I flashed back to when I was 12 & a nurse was holding me tightly in an effort to give me a flu shot (which my mom wasn't told I needed until the moment the Dr brought out the needle). it made me hate her even more, because my kid was crying but I had been SCREAMING at her & fighting her a hell of a lot worse than my kid was doing. & I felt like I was about to do the same to my kid, by giving him PTSD over a damn bandaid! I know I probably wasn't, but I just let go, daddy put the bandaid on, & he was fine after a moment. but I'm shaking & crying & my partner isn't sure what to do. I'm trying to contact my therapist but it's nearly 8pm here on a weekend so at best I won't get to her til tomorrow.

Top reply
    • Solarwolf

      605d

      @Teammomjeans I really like that idea, & I'm going to try that next week (as best I can cuz I'll be heavily drugged for my blood test). I did manage to give birth (was induced & forced to get a needle in my arm, then again in 6 months for kidney stones) but I never took a needle for the entire pregnancy & I think I almost lost my kid that last day. But I think I'll try a mantra or prepare a treat or something (can't do that exactly cuz I'll be in a hospital lab) afterwards to remind myself I did it.

    • Teammomjeans

      605d

      I don’t have PTSD with this particular struggle myself, but my daughter does. She got diagnosed with juvenile arthritis when she was 2 and ended up having to get daily shots. Making sure she doesn’t injure herself or anyone else when we have to stick her is so heartbreaking for everyone involved, but we have a little routine to celebrate her overcoming her fear. For her personally, it’s getting to put the needle in her sharps container and telling the needle “goodbye shot.” It’s seemed to make things more bearable for her. It sounds silly, but maybe try something like that when you have to confront that trigger. Repeat a mantra or something. “My child is safe. My child is cared for.” Or something like that. And just remember you’re doing a great job 💚

      • Solarwolf

        605d

        @Teammomjeans I really like that idea, & I'm going to try that next week (as best I can cuz I'll be heavily drugged for my blood test). I did manage to give birth (was induced & forced to get a needle in my arm, then again in 6 months for kidney stones) but I never took a needle for the entire pregnancy & I think I almost lost my kid that last day. But I think I'll try a mantra or prepare a treat or something (can't do that exactly cuz I'll be in a hospital lab) afterwards to remind myself I did it.

    • Skittlemasterrawr

      605d

      Just ask your partner to give you some space and go relax and ask them to take your child and distract them so you can decompress and come back to your safe space

      • Solarwolf

        605d

        @Skittlemasterrawr my kids never seen me this bad though & I think it freaked him out. I heard him ask daddy if dad (me) was. Gonna read him a bedtime story but idk how either of us can explain that I cant

        • wise

          605d

          @Solarwolf maybe reading him a bedtime story will help you come down from it and realize your child is okay, he knows you weren't gonna hurt him and you still love him so so much. make sure that at some point he sees that dad is okay if this is the worst episode he's ever witnessed. everything is okay, no one is upset with you, you're doing a perfectly fine job of being a parent (and honestly your kid has probably already forgotten about the whole thing and is just wondering why you're upset)

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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