Struggling with Mental Health

I feel like a broken person like I’ve been falling apart for a while now, I have so much hurt nd sadness nd anger in me, just from having anxiety disorders nd major depressive disorder nd the other problems I have nd between everything’s that’s happened in my life, idk what to do sumtimes it’s like this unbearable pain,nd I hate myself most of the time, nd I try so hard to be fine and to just be happy but I can’t, but I jus pretend like I am. when I feel myself falling apart it feels so hard to pick up all the pieces. I’m sorry I jus wanted to get that out if anyone does see this.