Struggling with dating and feeling left out

I’ve never dated someone that I met in person. I am horrible at talking to guys in person because of my anxiety and I am just way too nervous. So I went on dating apps and ended up finding a handful of amazing guys. I found my first love on tinder and my second on bumble. I hope to marry the second one, we’ve been dating two years now and I really think that online dating can be such a relief for people that may be more anxious in person. Getting to know someone even just a bit before meeting them in person can give you things to talk about before you see them and make it easier to bond and grow a connection. I really suggest dating apps!

So I got married at 21 and divorced at 26. I don’t think I will ever get married again. I don’t necessarily regret getting married but I don’t recommend it to everyone. This idea that we MUST find “the one” isn’t based on anything other than social construct. I had a fear of “dying alone” but now when I look at my life I realize that’s not likely. I’ll live alongside friends, family, short-term and long-term lovers, and that’s just as fulfilling (maybe even more so) than a marriage. And dating can be exhausting, especially as a person who is neurodiverse. Only do when you feel like it but never force it. Spend more time on your special interests and understanding yourself.

Woah, you're dating? You're farther along than me, so go get 'em! Haha.

Thank you jennnn 😊😊

Same to you !!!

I definitely understand this... I go through the very same thing, I've struggled through the years with even carrying a conversation with someone, face to face. I have found though that it's alil easier online to actually open up alil. But I definitely get what your struggling with and I wish you the very best, because yes you do deserve to be happy too.

Dating is exhausting and disappointing but there are good moments too ! I definitely feel more bummed out lately .. seems like a lot of trash on these apps and the last few relationships I had didn’t pan out like I had hoped .. it is sad to see everyone on Instagram getting married and having fun and I feel so alone with my cats thinking about how I’m going to manage week to week ( also recent health issues) I don’t know when it if I can even think about meeting anyone new in real life again I feel so awkward and I have a condition now that makes me cough 24/7 and I can’t even eat a meal normally these days so I worry about meeting anyone and having to tell them all the health stuff or look like a lunatic 🤪 here if you need to talk I get it !

The first thing to work on is wholeheartedly being comfortable being single. Being able to live your life for you, not someone else, is the key to being happy once in a relationship. Also, evaluating whether you want a relationship or just want to fit in. Not everyone does best in a relationship, and that is nothing to be ashamed of! Also, recognizing that relationships aren’t always the get married and have kids trope. Relationships come in all shapes and sizes! My partner and I are mostly platonic, for example, with only occasional romance and no expectation to marry. We function like roommates, and we are happy that way! It all comes down to what you want, and what feels right. So don’t let anyone push you one way or another, be an advocate for yourself. Love and light ♥️ 🌟

I never dated anybody in high school either because I was afraid what my family would think. They didn’t give me any reason to be anxious about that…I just felt like it was weird. But it’s not too late! I actually just got married to a girl I met on Bumble! And we knew we’d get married like a week after we met.

When you stop looking and you focus on yourself, your happiness, what you like and what you want to do for a career, you'll attract the right person. I did that and found my husband. Be yourself and love yourself first, everything else will fall into place

I met my boyfriend on a dating site five years ago and he has been crucial to my mental stability. When we started dating and I was terrified of getting over attached or scaring him away I followed my own “two week rule,” I didn’t make any plans or assumptions that included a timeline outside of two weeks from that very second. It was silly but it helped me a lot. If you need someone to talk to, feel free to reach out.

I have a really hard time on dating apps before I found my wife cause I like detailed reports of who the person is to get a better understanding of them then swipe left or right based on if you like them or not based on looks. Its rough but try coffee dates or blind dates where you can mingle with folks and learn more about them and maybe make friends and then see where it goes from there. ❤️👍