Overwhelmed and Panicky: Need Help

I'm glad you let some things off of your chest. I hope you're feeling a bit better now. I don't experience a lot of psychosis, so I don't really know what to say here. So, just know that a lot of people, including me, are here for you. Are you seeing any professionals? I'm sure they can assist you a lot better on this. But no matter what, you're okay. Don't give up. Don't give in to her and what she wants you to do.

First of all joining this community and being able to express all of this is not a small thing. It is not easy to share reply personal things with strangers and it is not easy to ask for help. It sounds like you are very aware of yourself and what you are facing which is half the battle. Can you take your meds this morning since you missed them last night? Depending on what the medication is even one missed dose can cause symptoms such as anxiety, nausea, dizziness and so much more depending on the medication it may not be the right choice to take it this morning. If you’re not sure call your doctor and ask. Even on a Sunday the doc or the pharmacy should have someone on call you can talk to. When you say it feels like your life is falling apart again has it fallen apart in the past? Our bodies and cells have unconscious memory. The body can remember pst trauma and we can feel things that feel out of place because it’s not in our conscious mind. For example on an anniversary of a loved one passing away even if we don’t register the date in our mind our body feels it again. Or if we are in a situation similar to a past trauma event our bodies go into fight or flight to protect us. The problem arises when the danger passes and we stay stuck in fight or flight and do not come back to a grounded place. When you say you shouldn’t talk to or about this girl who is putting that restriction that you shouldn’t do these things? You? Your dr? Someone else? We should do what feels right for us what will cause us the least harm or the most good. We should not do things just because others tell us to. You mentioned work. What job did you get? Is it something you dislike doing or are the coworkers not treating you right? I always say the interview is just as much about you interviewing the company as it is the company interviewing you. Not every job is a good fit for every person. Maybe this just isn’t the right job for you. Maybe there is another position you would look forward to going to.

I'm so so sorry you're going through this but you need to seek a professional's help as soon as possible? If you're 18, I'm not sure if you still live your parents or anyone to support you but it's good not to be alone in this state and go get help. If your medicine wasn't working so well for you, that's why you get monthly or so checkups to up your dosage or start something else. Please consult a hospital or doctor immediately, friend.