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so..I've hit an issue. I'm in a very long happy relationship with the best man I could ever ask for, our biggest issues? we both have bpd, and he recently discovered he also has npd(I don't want anyone in the replies talking bad about him for this, he is very self aware and keeps any toxic behavior in check) now, were both severely codependent because of our bpd. on top of that, he struggles very heavily with empathy, sympathy, and compassion. he is not malicious or toxic, but it's very hard for him to get his brain to genuinely care about other people's issues due to his trauma and disorders. he tries his best, but can sometimes act detached and cold towards me when hes struggling. not because he doesn't care or doesn't love me, but because he genuinely can't feel what I'm feeling or feel the need to feel bad. now, because of my bpd, any form of distance or detachment, triggers an abaolndonment spiral. it makes me feel rejected when I know he's not intentionally making me feel this way or would ever reject me, I said that his detachedness hurt a lot sometimes..and I think I hurt him by saying it. we're both codependent. and he can't control his detached states. I can't control my abandonment triggers. and it's putting a lot of stress on both of us.. does anyone know any advice for dating with bpd and npd?
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Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)
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