Feeling like a mistake

hey friend. i lived a long, long time putting on a mask, to the point where when i wanted to stop wearing one it was harder to take the mask off and easier to hide my real emotions out of habit. it ended up making me feel more and more isolated. it was painful. even now, with the worst my mental health has ever been, i occasionally catch myself trying to hide further into the corners so that people won't pry about how i am really doing. i'm not going to say your life will be suddenly happy tomorrow. i'm not going to say it'll be easy to suddenly not pretend. but i want to just extend a... kind of virtual hug to you and say it's okay. (insert hug here) i know it hurts. i'm sorry it's such a lonesome and terrible battle inside. i struggle with it, too, and i constantly am thinking that i want to die. but hey, you and i are both here, by some wild miracle. and on the crest of that miracle i want to cheer you on to keep living, one moment and one minute at a time. you are so strong for getting to this point. you are worth it. promise. text me any time if you need someone on the other side of the screen. sending positive vibes ♡