See Alike in...

Alike App

Browser

Dissociating during sex, need advice

IndigoBro

704d

(NSFW) I have noticed that I always dissociate whenever I’m the one who is receiving during sex. even though I have a long-term partner who I know to be safe. It’s that thing where you’re watching your body and wondering what it might do next. And you lose the feeling of emotions or anything like that. Why would I feel unsafe to dissociate like fully every time even after so many years? Most of my trauma isn’t even sex related. I generally don’t like receiving because it’s more complicated and less satisfying but I know my partner enjoys it sometimes and I just don’t know how to un-dissociate when it comes to sex. It’s like I feel the anxiety and fear tension build in like 2 seconds and then snap, I’m dissociated for the rest of it. Anyone have any advice? I have tried mindfulness but I think I just dissociate for that too.

1

9

9

Complex post traumatic stress disorder

Dopamine

Anxiety (Including GAD)

Acute Anxiety

Testosterone

View all
Top reply
    • Hiraeth

      684d

      I don't have answers, because I'm still looking for a them myself, but maybe you'd be willing to tell me more about your emotional block? I have a hard time feeling anything that isn't adrenaline-caused anxiety/excitement or lack of dopamine/serotonin depression. Have you found any way around that? How does it affect your relationships?

      0

      Reply
      Chat
    • Hiraeth

      684d

      I don't have answers, because I'm still looking for a them myself, but maybe you'd be willing to tell me more about your emotional block? I have a hard time feeling anything that isn't adrenaline-caused anxiety/excitement or lack of dopamine/serotonin depression. Have you found any way around that? How does it affect your relationships?

      0

      Reply
    • BambiStar

      702d

      If something is making you uncomfortable or causing you negative effects in any way during sex... stop doing that thing. If a particular act is making you dissociate, that's a sign of a boundary you might be ignoring. I agree with explodingatom, your preferences are your boundaries. You shouldn't have to put those aside for someone else, long term partner or no

      1

      Reply
    • ExplodingAtom

      704d

      You're saying that you generally don't like receiving. That's WHY you feel unsafe during certain sex acts. Your preferences ARE your boundaries. If you're a top, you can't force yourself to be a bottom. Please pay attention to what your comfortable with and communicate that to your partner. If your partner doesn't listen to you speaking up about these things that's a major red flag. Though I don't know your situation, particularly in terms of how much you've communicated to your partner.

      3

      Reply
      • IndigoBro

        700d

        @ExplodingAtom thanks for helping me figure out how to know my boundaries! definitely got to work on being more aware of them and communicating them more firmly.

        1

        Reply
        • ExplodingAtom

          699d

          @IndigoBro I'm happy I could be helpful to your situation!

          1

          Reply
    • AnimalBoy

      704d

      Are you sure it stems from trauma and not gender dysphoria? There was a long period of time where I thought my sex repulsion and disassociated during recieving sex bc of my sex based trauma but now the only thing that has changed is that ive been on testosterone long enough and have a partner who directly helps so I don't have as much bottom dysphoria any longer and I've realized that it's pretty much entirely correlated to the dysphoria.

      1

      Reply
      • IndigoBro

        700d

        @AnimalBoy wow u r so right it’s totally bottom dysphoria. Everything makes more sense now.

        0

        Reply
        • AnimalBoy

          699d

          @IndigoBro I'm glad I could help! If you need any other advice or anything feel free to message me:3

          1

          Reply
    • Jackpilot

      704d

      Have you ever thought about looking into a sex therapist? I've heard they can be quite helpful. But I get the issue. It's a hard one to deal with.

      1

      Reply

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

Thank you! Your submission has been received!
Oops! Something went wrong while submitting the form.

Want to chat or share? Download the Alike app now and get complete access to Alike.health's unique features.

Alike health

Instantly get answers to medical questions with our AI, built from the collective wisdom of our community facing similar experiences

Write your question here...

Get answer
Thank you! Your submission has been received!

Related Questions

Find people who are
experiencing a similar
medical reality

join the community
100% Free
100%
Free
Alike is a transformative platform that goes beyond just bringing together patients; it meticulously connects individuals based on multiple critical factors, such as age, gender, comorbidities, medications, diet, and more, fostering a community of knowledge, support and empathy.
© 2020-2023 Alike, Inc
About AlikeWisdomFAQEditorial TeamAll ConditionsAll PostsAll Communities
Your PrivacyStoriesCommunity GuidelinesTerms of UsePrivacy PolicyBlogContact Us

Download Alike for the full experience

JOIN

View All

Bupropion

night sweats

paranoid

Valium

sertraline

palpitations

Anxiety (Including GAD)

Depression

palpitations

Depression

Valium

Bupropion