Heartbroken and Lost: Need Advice on How to Change for Her

The others put it better, but don't change for someone else as micha said, it's not going to work if all you want is someone else to think you're better. See if therapy is an option and work towards bettering yourself because you WANT too.

best advice: change for yourself. My depression got so much worse after a devestating breakup and i couldnt get over it for like 2 whole years, i wish i started to try to heal earlier. My best healing came out of me asking myself: what do i want out of life? what do i value? If you value having meaningful connections, reach out to existing friends, or try to ignite bonds with old ones or new acquaintances, have a bro night, find someone you trust and open up. Maybe you value mental wellbeing, build your emotional intelligence, figure out whats causing you pain and stress and remove it from your life, replace it with more constructive activities. Maybe you value good health; improve your sleep schedule, eat a little bit healthier, start listening to your body & try to give it what it needs. When you are your best self, proud of who you are and how far youve come, or even just working towards living whatever you consider a "good life", you are instantly more attractive (as long as you're not a dick about it). Self-care increases in self-value. Just dont let her rule your life. Focus on what *you* want, if its right, itll happen.

None of us know you so asking us how you should change is about as good as blind guessing. Like MusicalMicha says you shouldnt change for someone else. Take a long look at yourself first and think about what really needs to change. Try not to judge when you do it, just take a look, in a mirror or close your eyes and look around that head and decide for yourself What qualities are worth keeping, which are worth abandoning and Why they are worth keeping or abandoning. Once you have done this maybe ask them what qualities they like and didnt like and why and cross reference and take another look and decide again. You spend your whole lofe doing this unconciously, picking up new behaviors as you age, and (hopefully) losing ones that are seen as immature, or harmful. Might as well put some though in who Caesar is, if you going to be if you are going to be Caesar

Do not change for another person. If you want to change, do it for yourself and yourself only. You deserve a woman that loves you for you. Sometimes, the person you think is for you isn't necessarily the person that could be for you. Be unapologetically yourself, and a woman who will appreciate every little thing, including the imperfections, will come along. To help heal, I suggest surrounding yourself with people who truly care about you, be it family, friends, etc. Find something that you enjoy, and just focus on you. Be your best self, and it will shine through!