Struggling with Depression and PTSD on My Birthday

I dont know if this is depression or something else, but I hate it. I'm not used to not knowing if something is caused by depression or not, having been diagnosed with it since 2015 but having distinctly had it since 2012. but my bedroom lamp dying today caused a mental breakdown. for some reference, I have ptsd and can't sleep without a light on, so my options are lay in the dark with panic attacks all night, or have my overhead light on and not be able to sleep. also it is my birthday today, went to my parent's house to celebrate and they triggered my eating disorder very hard core by videoing me to make fun of me eating my cake (it was clearly not just to commemorate my birthday, they don't do that and started videoing because I was messing with the cake for about 5 minutes to prep to eat it and my mother starts talking to me through the video as if I'm a child being silly. I'm turning 22 today). I feel like im over reacting but I don't know how to stop if so. I can't tell if this is caused by depression or anxiety, but I had a really bad breakdown over my bedroom lamp dying. wether it's actually about the lamp or about my mother, I feel like im over reacting. I don't like my birthday either, so maybe that's why?? idk but either way I feel like crying and hyperventilating and writing in my notebook about suicidal ideations is an over reaction no matter what. not sure what advice im looking for, but genuinely just need someone to chat with about it, and my partner hasn't been sleeping well and actually fell asleep at a good time tonight so it would ultimately make me feel 10× worse if I woke them up now at 2am because my lamp died.