I don't feel like my family respects me. I've told them multiple times that I struggle with many different things due to my asd, such as sensory issues, overstimulation, and feeling overwhelmed. they always undermine these symptoms and generalize it as stress, I wish they could see my struggle instead of treating it like a chore.

Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD)

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  • Grace_Butron


    I think you are my new best friend I feel like that all the time I just tell my self it will get better sometimes it does sometimes it does bot but I tell my self just to stay positive and you should to 💕

  • Katty


    I’m sorry to hear that. It’s hard to tell from the message: have you just explained it to them or also tried to set clear boundaries. The explanation and then ignoring it is horrible, but if you haven’t tried setting clear boundaries maybe it’s not unsalvageable. … You could do that by having conversations prior about things you can and cannot do and agree on how those situations can be best dealt with instead. If it’s things in the moment you can say something along the lines of “I can’t do this/ X makes me uncomfortable because X autistic reason. Can we stop that/ do X instead” If they refuse or ignore you, you could say “as previously stated X will not work for me. As such, for my mental health I am going to remove my self from this environment.” And leave. If they’re undermining your autistic experience by calling it anxiety or smth else you could say “actually X is not anxiety, it’s an autistic trait. Autism is a neurodivergence and disability. It isn’t something that I can get over or should be changed, however, I do need understand and accommodations. By calling this anxiety you are minimizing my challenges and I find that hurtful.” If they don’t like it honestly that’s there problem. You have a disability and they’re refusing to accommodate you. I hope it gets better ❤️ ❤️

    • Stinkyparanoidrat


      I have tried to set boundaries but it's my mom who especially doesn't respect it at all, and I'm sure it's because she's narcissistic but that's a different can of worms, one of my sensory issues is being hugged without warning or consent. I hate the feeling, it's awful and it can be too long. I keep it at 3 seconds at most before it starts making me feel irritated, and I've explained and tried to set this boundary, but my mom will throw some toddler like fit and gas light me by saying that I don't care about her needs. Which at this point I'm not gonna lie, I really dont.

  • GracefulKim


    In all fairness, it is a chore to them. Just like it's a chore for you to confirm to their world. If you want them to help you by saying our doing something while they're interacting with you, speak up. Be clear. Remember their brains do not work like yours. Remember you're brain does not work like there's too. I've found it helpful to

    • GracefulKim


      fantasize about what I would wish they would say and then try and ask them to say that next time. If it works well then you found a solution! But you might have to tweak it a few times. Just ask them to be patient while the two of you work to get along. You don't need to think alike in order to get along and enjoy life together.

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