Remembering the feeling of dying

Content warning: talking abt death/sewerslide/overdose About 2 years ago I attempted suicide by overdose, and I almost died. Luckily I was found, driven to a hospital, had supportive care etc. Since then I've gotten better, but I can't help but remember the feeling of dying, that weird cold fuzziness, and I want to feel it again. I'm not sure what to do about this, I just needed to let it out I guess. I know very few people will understand that feeling of overdosing, but those that do, do you miss it? Do you long for it in a weird sense? I don't necessarily want to die, I just want to feel that adrenaline and panic that the body feels as it dies, you know?