Emzz

26d

Last night my partner and I got into a really heated argument and he said things that were hurtful and in the heat of the moment i threatened to leave him; i know i shouldn’t have and we’ve both apologised for the things we said and said we were going to work through this; but how do i move forward with this
I have my sister telling me to dump him and my mom telling me to stay and work through it and i don’t even know what i want anymore

Depression

Anxiety (Including GAD)

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  • AstraDragon

    26d

    Relationships are hard. Does this relationship feel safe and happy to you? If not then maybe it's best to either look for relationship counseling or try and find someone new. But in the end it is up to YOU and your feelings. It is no one else's decision

    • Emzz

      26d

      he makes me happy and i feel safe with him and yeah we have our struggles but i’m trying really hard not to give up; and i think i just need time because i have so many different people telling me what to do with my relationship instead of them being there to support me

      • AstraDragon

        26d

        If he makes you happy and you feel safe then thats good. But it is up to YOU since it is your relationship. And yes relationships have their ups and downs thats normal

      • AstraDragon

        26d

        My husband and I fight sometimes but that doesn't mean we don't love each other. They say that fighting every once in a while is actually a sign of a healthy relationship

  • titch

    26d

    i agree with what astradragon said. it’s your decision. but also , i recently had a big argument with my boyfriend but we still love each other and apologised for everything. we then found it was a little weird together and i thought “oh no it’s off with him now it’s the end” but i distanced myself from him for a couple days while still messaging good morning and goodnight and that i love him. after that i talked to a mutual friend about what i was struggling with about my boyfriend and then we all three talked with the friend mediating. we came up with a plan for each problem , we communicated how we really felt in a guilt-free anger-free environment. after that it improved a bit but i still felt it wasn’t completely right. i was so lost thinking “how on earth do i fix this” and now i’m realising that it wasn’t all on me to fix this and i was taking the whole weight of the problems and he was just taking the emotions and stress from it. he’s autistic and i have adhd so communication is difficult but we’ve been together for 10 months and i wanted to try again before giving up because we’re moving in together in a month. i did a load of research on autistic people and relationships with neuro divergence and it was very difficult but i made even more solutions we hadn’t tried before to problems that were really affecting our relationship and sent them to him in a note. i felt before like he wasn’t listening to me but i think i just wasn’t talking the right way. and now he’s improved sm so what i’m trying to say is that if you love each other and you both want it to work and you both feel safe and comfortable in each other’s arms and minds then it doesn’t matter how hard it gets , that’s a relationship worth keeping. a lot of people are assholes so if you find a good one it’s worth the effort. that doesn’t mean just forget the argument. that means work through it and take your time. xxx

  • justyourlocalcryptid

    26d

    I mean, can you provide more context? on the argument, issues in general, your doubts, etc.

  • 4byfour

    26d

    Thank you so much for reaching out. I’ll just simply give you a 🫂

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