Struggling with Depression and Isolation

Since March I have had a lot of life and lifestyle changes. My whole life fell apart and I'm slowly trying to pick up the pieces of it. I've struggled with depression for most of my adult life. I moved a little over a year ago to a brand new area, left my family and friends, but never made new ones. In March when my life fell apart I lost everyone that I didn't lose when I left. Including my family. I am terrible at making friends and when I scare them away with my truth. After learning more and more about self in these last few months my depression and feelings of not being good enough or being too much have really gotten the better of me and even my partner has commented that they don't like being around me when I am having down days, which doesn't help, but, they are going through much more than I am. Sometimes I wish that I had someone who would listen and hear me. The reasons behind my life change is hard and most people think I am a horrible human after hearing what happened. I don't blame them, but no one really understands either. I tried so hard to do what was right but I failed harder than an unopened parachute. I feel like a failure, like I'm worthless, and not really good for anything and honestly, it sucks.