Lately I’ve found myself over-analysing every conversation I have with people, because it’s been pointed out to me that my tone comes across v different from how I think. It’s made me really self conscious about talking. Doesn’t help that when things are perceived differently from how I meant it, I’ve been told that autism isn’t an excuse and I’m apparently just being rude 🥲
Anxiety (Including GAD)
Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)
Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD)
I get this 100%. I work in a management position and even when I send emails I have to read them over several times to make sure I didnt slip something in there that could be taken the wrong way. And I still miss things that I have to explain. My older sister and I have a very weak relationship because she takes it personally. But I have enough good people in my life that let me reexplain or try to understand how I could have meant it. Im sorry you have to go through this ❤️
It’s comforting to see people also go through this, but it’s so frustrating! I totally understand people taking it personally to an extent. Like their emotions are valid too. But I just want the chance to explain because my intentions aren’t bad when I’m talking. It’s incredibly deflating when someone won’t hear my explanation, but I know I can’t make someone listen that doesn’t want to
I have the same issue! I have family members who constantly refer to my autism whenever I bring up any kind of conflict, and have had me convinced that I can't read situations properly and misread cues. At work, my boss has said I'm extremely good with customers, and I've won awards for my performance. Don't get me wrong, I still massively overanalyze everything I'm planning to say and can flounder if I need to go "off-script." I've just decided my socializing can't be as bad as I think it is, and consider my overthinking to be just that.
Yeah I get this a lot especially if I was trying to say a joke, I pretty much don't joke anymore unless I clarify it's a joke (which makes it less funny) or I just do cheesy puns
😬 people saying "autism isn't an excuse" is just ableist. it isn't an excuse when you do something to hurt somebody else, but the way you talk isn't something you can control (without heavy masking anyway, and that's exhausting).
people are awful about this, you aren't alone. i have no tone when i speak and i don't make facial expressions, so people have called me emotionless and a robot and things like that. but that's just how i look and sound, so they're being jerks
it's the same for you, except those people are trying to make you feel guilty instead of just calling you a name. it's really, really hard to get around the insecurity that causes, i'm so sorry you have to deal with that. i'm sending good vibes your way 💕
I get that all the time, that's how I was reported to have autism because when questioned my tone didn't match my answers.
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