SomeKindaKid

67d

This is just a vent and if you wanna give advice you can but don’t feel the need to: I’ve been under a lot of stress lately. Moving and fighting with my family, friends leaving me. It just seems like the worse day ever. I believe I’ve had worse, I mean I haven’t been crying all day wishing I was never born, but I’m also not… content? Happy? I’m not sure. I want new friends who understand me. I want to cry on someone’s shoulder without them expecting a kiss or more. I want people not to question my aceness. I don’t want people to question all my health issues! I have so many issues! Even I don’t keep track of them!!!! If I didn’t write them all down I’d honestly forget! I am not my issues. I feel bad for coming back to this one old friend every couple weeks with another meltdown. He says he doesn’t mind and he loves helping me and loves me. At this point it doesn’t feel like people love me. I know people do, but that feeling you know? I started missing my ex boyfriend and I realized it wasn’t him I missed, it was feeling happy and feeling love that I really missed. I’ve been looking in the dating pool recently and I’ve just found it really hard to connect to anyone. I got over 90 likes in less than an hour even with me setting a very small age range. because I am a fairly attractive fairly interesting person, I’m not the most interesting or the most attractive but I’m not conventionally (is that the right word?) ugly and boring. I’m afraid men like the idea of me, without liking me. I’m hoping I get over these feelings, no one wants to feel depressed. I just feel like I’m losing hope, which I know if I wait it out eventually things will happen and I will be happy again, just I wish it were sooner rather than later.

Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)

Mood swings

Depression

Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)

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