Struggling with my alters

the intense fear that you're faking is called imposter syndrome, and it's common in systems. you're not supposed to know about the system, because that means knowing that you have trauma, so it is completely normal to experience. we struggled with it a lot. what helped us is certain phrases, such as "if we were faking, we could just stop" and "why would we put ourselves through all of this pain?"

I often feel like ive just lost my mind and they aren't real

I am in the same boat with you. I have been aware of the existence of my other alters for almost 11 years now (since I was about 9 or 10) and have not yet been diagnosed (I’m not in a safe place to do so). There’s some times where I feel and know I’m my heart they are real and that I’m not faking it but sometimes (especially right when I wake up in the morning) they are Completely quiet and it makes me question whether or not they are actually real. My primary gatekeeper (I have three and I’m not sure why) assures me all the time that him and everyone else who’s been/is around are real and always have been real. I hope you know you’re not alone in feeling this way and I hope that you don’t lose confidence in who you are and who everyone else with you is.