Dealing with Misunderstanding: My Step Mum's View on Autism

How can a diagnosis that helps you understand yourself and feel seen "ruin" their life? Because you are getting the attention you need and they have to make changes to show compassion?

It hurt you deeply, and your feelings are important and should be honored. I’d say mention it. However you know the situation better than anyone else, and you can determine if you think it might just be harmful instead! I will say, that when I first realized autism was the thing that I needed to understand myself I very much would not stop talking about it (thank you special interests) and my mother had a hard time with that, but I said to her “I’m figuring out myself for the first time in my life, I know to you it may not be important or you may be annoyed but I am allowed and deserve to understand myself. If you don’t want to hear about it that’s fine, but know that it’s hurting me that you don’t want to know all of me” maybe something like that, where you can try and explain the why of your behavior to them, and then put it in her boat if she interacts with it more? That’s my two thoughts! I’m sorry you had to hear that, that’s shitty